Celebrating Ten Years of Running: When people look at me....

When I was a child and people looked at me, they saw a long metal leg brace, a pixie hair cut, buck teeth, crutches and red polio shoes. As I wrote in my first poem, Running the Race after receiving the diagnosis of Post-Polio Syndrome in December of 2006:

I always wore those 'special' shoes the kids they poked and teased
With no support and much abuse with childhood I wasn't pleased.
But put nose to the grindstone and learned all that I could
I couldn't kick a ball but my grades were always good.

My brother, his friends and my peers would deliberately run away from me and then make fun of me when I tried desperately to catch up to them.

I was called "Easy Out Alper" in gym class.

When I gave the high school valedictorian speech no one saw the invisible scars of rape and nightly beatings that took place from the time I was 8 years old. When people looked at me on the podium no one saw what it took for me to get straight A's in the middle of a household rife with violence and drug and alcohol abuse.

I was inducted into the Jesuit Honor Society, Alpha Sigma Nu at Boston College where I received my MSW in 1984. When people looked at me they saw a woman passionate about social justice and doing good in the world.

When my Team at the VA looked at me shortly after the diagnosis of Post-Polio Syndrome, they thought I had Parkinson's Disease. They also looked at me and thought I was crazy for leaving my award winning career just 3 years shy of when I would have been eligible for retirement.

When the Team at the Post-Polio Clinic looked at me, they saw a woman who was going to spend the rest of her life in a wheelchair, possibly needing a feeding tube, a sleep apnea machine and who would experience a decline in functioning.

I saw a challenge!

After completing intensive outpatient physical therapy with an earth angel of a physical therapist, (who saw my potential beyond the diagnosis of Post-Polio Syndrome) I hired a personal trainer to see if we could build on the home program I was given at discharge. Six months later, in February of 2008, I declared that I would run the 2009 Boston Marathon for Spaulding Rehab Hospital even though I had never run a day in my life. When my personal trainer looked at me she could have easily told me I was crazy to set that for my goal; instead she sent me to get fitted for my first pair of running shoes.

When I discovered the gift of running in my life, I began to transform from the inside out. I felt connected and whole. I looked at myself through a different lens than the one I used as a filter as a survivor of paralytic polio and trauma. And, when people looked at me they saw my strength, my courage, my power of endurance, my invincibility, my heart and my soul.

Tom and I had a wonderful 5K run on Saturday despite the heat. It was my fastest time since we crossed the finish line of the Bermuda Half Marathon in January. I'd been taking it easy while a hip/groin/back issue healed. I was pushing hard and did not think it would be reflected in my time given the heat. I made sure that I hydrated well and paused for our "water stops." I felt nauseous after the run with a great sense of satisfaction that, after ten years of running, I love the sport of running and I love challenging myself out on the roads.



When people look at me after we post our "runfies" on Facebook, I want people to see a message of healing, hope and possibility. I want people to see that we are not our diagnosis and we have a tremendous capacity to heal mind, body and soul.

When people look at me, I want them to see the joy and gratitude I feel to be alive, to feel healthy and vibrant and to know that whatever the challenge, once we tame the dragon there is a wonderful gift that awaits us all.

To your health and wellness
From my heart to yours,
Mary

Proud to be a part of Friends of Blue Diamond Athletic Displays, Inc.

Be sure to visit my website by following this link.

My books are available on Amazon.

Feel the Heal: An Anthology of Poems to Heal Your Life


Coming Home: A Memoir of Healing Hope and Possibility that chronicles the first 7 years of my healing journey:


And my latest and greatest book - Going the Distance: The Power of Endurance (With a Foreword by Jacqueline Hansen):