Celebrating Ten Years of Running: The Rainbow Connection

We had a very difficult and challenging weekend. Our daughter was suffering and struggling with her symptoms of severe depression and PTSD and all that goes along with it. She had been discharged the previous Wednesday without a discharge plan! Fortunately she put together her own plan with the help and support of a wonderful social worker through the Brookline Police Department. The Women's Partial Hospitalization program has an incredibly caring and talented staff of professionals including a psychiatrist who added a new medication to her regimen and is closely monitoring her at the program but as I said, the weekend was incredibly difficult and challenging.

Tom and I managed to get in our run and pool time adhering to our health and fitness regimen and making sure we practiced impeccable self care. We were so grateful when Monday came and she could return to the structure of a day program.

We got up early as is our usual Monday morning routine. We took time to meditate, do our core workout, have a banana and water and go on our 5K run.

It was a glorious sunrise:


We passed an older gentleman who we have seen walking around the Reservoir. He was running on Monday morning. We smiled and gave a little salute as we passed each other.

We saw another runner who we have seen during our early morning runs and shouted out a good morning to you which he echoed back to us.

As we rounded our first lap around the Reservoir, a dark cloud appeared and it started raining.

Fortunately the air was relatively warm for a December day in Boston.

The shower didn't last long and as we were about to start our 2nd lap I just happened to look up in the sky. There was a rainbow!



It appeared at first as a quarter of a rainbow with pale hues. It grew brighter and we all stopped in our tracks in awe to watch its appearance grow and glow across the sky.



I sobbed and could no longer see through my raindrop and tear stained glasses. I took off my glasses and we continued our run under the rainbow.

I didn't pay attention to our pace but we did serious negative splits. As we passed the two other runners who were now running in the opposite direction from us. We were still smiling and murmuring about how in awe we were of the rainbow connection we made.

The older gentleman commented, "You realize of course that if we would not have gotten up early on this Monday morning, we never would have seen this magnificent sight."

I paused and reflected on how much I would have missed had I not taken a leap of faith to heal my life after the diagnosis of Post-Polio Syndrome and followed the lead of the Divine to the sport of running.



To your health and wellness
From my heart to yours
Mary

My healing journey using the power of visualization is featured in David R. Hamilton's book, "How Your Mind Can Heal Your Body-Anniversary Edition." It's available on Amazon.


Be sure to visit my website by following this link.

My books are available on Amazon.

Feel the Heal: An Anthology of Poems to Heal Your Life


Coming Home: A Memoir of Healing Hope and Possibility that chronicles the first 7 years of my healing journey:


Going the Distance: The Power of Endurance (With a Foreword by Jacqueline Hansen):


***Coming Soon - The Adventures of Runnergirl 1953***
The Adventures of Runnergirl 1953 takes you on Mary McManus’ healing odyssey from a wheelchair to the finish line of the 2009 Boston Marathon and beyond. After the diagnosis of Post-Polio Syndrome in December 2006, Mary got still and asked for Divine Guidance. She harnessed the power of her mind to heal her body, feverishly writing poetry in which she imagined herself healthy, whole and free from the shackles of her youth. Mary’s quest to heal her life led her to the sport of running that tested her mettle while fueling her journey of transformation from a survivor of childhood paralytic polio and severe trauma at the hands of family members to a woman who embodies faith, grace under fire, courage, determination, endurance and resilience. Running became a way of life for Mary. As you’ll discover in “The Adventures of Runnergirl 1953” nothing, not even a serious knee injury in December of 2014 could stop her on the roads or in her life. Mary’s story is one that will leave you cheering for the underdog and discovering the meaning of different ability as Mary overcame every challenge that life presented to her.

Celebrating Ten Years of Running: Thirty Years Ago Today!

December 5, 1988 I began my almost twenty year tenure as a social worker at the Department of Veterans Affairs. The chief, Jim Blair, said he wanted to bring me on board because of my credentials but also because I was a mother of twins. He had twins and wanted to compare notes as I went through the various milestones with my twins. We dropped off our 18 month old twins at the Government Center Child Care Center and I walked into the 6th floor office at Court Street of the Visual Impairment Services Team Coordinator (VIST). It was a dream job for me that would enable me to use my training as a clinical social worker and my background in public relations and marketing to rebuild the program that would serve legally blind and visually impaired veterans. After almost a year of pouring my heart and soul into the program, building the roster of legally blind vets from 42 to over 600 and receiving a Blinded Veterans Association Certificate of Appreciation Award, Jim came to my door to tell me that I would not get my promotion. The old boy network reared its ugly head. The person in charge of VIST in West Haven Connecticut needed to come back to Boston and "they" gave him my job! The reason he had to leave West Haven? He was involved in many sexual harassment complaints.

I began looking for another job outside of the VA. Jim was incredibly apologetic and asked me what position I would like to move into/create for myself. We decided I'd become a member of the Primary Care Team. I worked with primarily geriatric veterans and their families and was an integral part of the Ex-POW team.

I was juggling motherhood and my career and I did not know the importance of self care.

In 1996 I began to experience twinges of not feeling well. Fatigue, chronic pain, occasional limping which I attributed to the residuals of childhood paralytic polio began to surface.

By 2004 the symptoms worsened to include numbness and tingling down my jaw and right arm, chronic fatigue, weakness, pain everywhere in my body, depression, anxiety (well duh who wouldn't feel depressed and anxious with these symptoms) and I felt as though my life was spiraling out of control. Even though I was an award winning social worker at the VA having received Social Worker of the Year, Employee of the Month and Certificate of Appreciation awards, and had a beautiful home and family life in Chestnut Hill, Massachusetts, I knew there was something seriously wrong happening to my body.

My primary care physician at the time insisted that it was all in my head and referred me to see a psychiatrist while dispensing samples of Paxil which I flushed down the toilet.

By the summer of 2006 I knew I had to take action. I asked for Divine Guidance and "google Post Polio" was the reply.

I kept up my caseload and tried to hide what was happening to me as best I could. Leading a double life was something I learned growing up in a violent dysfunctional household. I became high school valedictorian while fighting for my life every night and on the weekends at the hands of a psychotic grandmother.

In October of 2006 I had my first appointment at the Spaulding Rehab's International Rehab Center for Polio and Post Polio. By December the diagnosis of exclusion of Post-Polio Syndrome was given to me. I was told to prepare to spend the result of my life in a wheelchair and that if there were any hope of stopping the symptoms where they were that I needed to quit my full time job!

But I was only 3 years shy of when I 'could' retire and I had it all figured out how I was going to spend my retirement. I was going to get a little job in retail somewhere - like Bloomingdale's and meet friends for lunch and enjoy whatever time I had left on planet earth.

The Universe obviously had different plans for me.

Life as I had known it, along with my retirement plans, came to a screeching halt.

I was diagnosed with a progressive neuromuscular disease and told that the "normal" aging process was going to accelerate because of my history of paralytic polio. I needed to prepare to spend the rest of my life in a wheelchair.

In February of 2007, I got very still and asked once again for Divine guidance.

The answer that came in the dark, cold night of winter and the dark night of my mind, body and soul was a poem:
Running the Race
Early summer 1959 my kindergarten year
Everyone around me filled with nervous fear
Despite the Salk vaccine hope polio would disappear
The polio virus crept right up and knocked me in the rear.
Dancing all around the gym feeling free just like a bird
I dropped to the ground just like a stone
and no one said a word.
The pain it was so searing-the diagnosis even worse
"It's polio" the doctor said...he was abrupt and terse.
Called one of the 'lucky ones' I had a 'mild case'
But with the other athletes I could never keep their pace.
Miss Holly physical therapist,
curly hair and a warm, broad smile
It tempered the pain of being apart - to walk I'd take awhile.

I always wore those 'special' shoes
the kids they poked and teased
With no support and much abuse
with childhood I wasn't pleased.
But put nose to the grindstone and learned all that I could
I couldn't kick a ball but my grades were always good.
Years went by and no more thought to polio did I give
I accepted the limp and everything else
and decided my life I would live.
But symptoms of weakness and muscle pain did grow
I kept a stoic face hoping no one else would know.

Life no longer was my own I struggled through each day
Suffered in silence, isolated from friends-
trying to keep depression at bay.
And with the grace of glorious God my world it opened wide
I discovered there was a Post Polio team
and they were on my side.

Using wheelchair to travel, set limits on what I could do,
Resulted in joy to realize I could live life anew.
Celebrated my body- creaks, groans and need for a brace
While in my mind I focused on winning a 10K race.
Sought out paths for healing and my spirit flew free
For the first time in life, I could truly be me.
The chains are gone and possibilities abound
I'm a tree with my roots planted firmly in ground.
I'm now off the sidelines, no need to sit and whine
So much gratitude fills my heart and love and beauty shine.
After all these years I can join the loving human race
I exceed all expectations and now I set the pace.

On May 25, 2007 I took a leap of faith leaving behind my beloved career as a VA social worker that had begun 30 years ago today.

That poem foreshadowed my 2009 Boston Marathon run and many many adventures as a runner.

I celebrate the anniversary of when I began a career that proudly served those who served. While the work was grueling at times, the rewards were great. I cherish the people I worked with and the veterans and their families who let me into their lives and hearts.

I celebrate my twelve years of healing and ten years of running with a full and grateful heart for how everything worked out. Sometimes we must be willing to give up the life we had planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us.

To your health and wellness
From my heart to yours
Mary

My healing journey using the power of visualization is featured in David R. Hamilton's book, "How Your Mind Can Heal Your Body-Anniversary Edition." It's available on Amazon.


Be sure to visit my website by following this link.

My books are available on Amazon.

Feel the Heal: An Anthology of Poems to Heal Your Life


Coming Home: A Memoir of Healing Hope and Possibility that chronicles the first 7 years of my healing journey:


Going the Distance: The Power of Endurance (With a Foreword by Jacqueline Hansen):


***Coming Soon - The Adventures of Runnergirl 1953***
The Adventures of Runnergirl 1953 takes you on Mary McManus’ healing odyssey from a wheelchair to the finish line of the 2009 Boston Marathon and beyond. After the diagnosis of Post-Polio Syndrome in December 2006, Mary got still and asked for Divine Guidance. She harnessed the power of her mind to heal her body, feverishly writing poetry in which she imagined herself healthy, whole and free from the shackles of her youth. Mary’s quest to heal her life led her to the sport of running that tested her mettle while fueling her journey of transformation from a survivor of childhood paralytic polio and severe trauma at the hands of family members to a woman who embodies faith, grace under fire, courage, determination, endurance and resilience. Running became a way of life for Mary. As you’ll discover in “The Adventures of Runnergirl 1953” nothing, not even a serious knee injury in December of 2014 could stop her on the roads or in her life. Mary’s story is one that will leave you cheering for the underdog and discovering the meaning of different ability as Mary overcame every challenge that life presented to her.

Celebrating Ten Years of Running: That Felt SOOO Good!

The rain finally stopped. We knew that no matter what we were going to go outdoors for our early morning run on Monday but were grateful and happy we didn't have to don our ponchos. Despite the darkness followed by grey skies and fog, I was excited about getting out for Monday's run. The temperatures were in the 40's; a much welcome relief from the frigid temps of the past week. After a 20 minute meditation and core work, we headed out the front door.

The cool air was refreshing. There was beauty in the barren trees; a reminder of the importance of letting go and surrendering to nature. We warmed up and by the time we got to the Reservoir, Tom and I were ready to pick up the pace. The water gently lapped against the shore of the Reservoir. Although there was the absence of lush green and ducks and geese, there was a sense of peace and solitude with everything as it was in the moment.



Even though it was cool outside, I worked up a good sweat as a result of negative splits for our 3.11 mile run.

As I peeled off my layers and prepared breakfast, I was moved to say out loud, "That felt soooo good."



I had never run a day in my life before April of 2008. When my personal trainer asked me for my next health and fitness goals in February of 2008 I said, "Well I want to feel free in my body. I want to diversify my workouts. I want to dance. I want to walk outside unencumbered...." As Janine gathered up all of her things I said, "Wait. I have one more goal." She put her things down by the door. "I want to run the Boston Marathon for Spaulding next year. I hear they have a Race for Rehab team." To this day I don't know what kept her from turning tail and getting as far away from me as possible but she said non-plussed, "Well okay. You're going to need a pair of running shoes."

I had no idea the world that would open before me through the sport of running. My mettle was tested, friendships forged and I unearthed the treasure of who I am.



Running is the gift that keeps on giving.

Getting up to greet the dawn of a new day, sharing unplugged time with my life and running partner Tom, working up a good sweat and being able to say, "That felt soooo good," before many people were out of bed is one of the most wonderful feelings in the world.

As Bill Rodgers wrote to me when he autographed his book, "Marathon Man," "We're runners. Let's run forever!"

To that I say Amen.

To your health and wellness
From my heart to yours
Mary

My healing journey using the power of visualization is featured in David R. Hamilton's book, "How Your Mind Can Heal Your Body-Anniversary Edition." It's available on Amazon.


Be sure to visit my website by following this link.

My books are available on Amazon.

Feel the Heal: An Anthology of Poems to Heal Your Life


Coming Home: A Memoir of Healing Hope and Possibility that chronicles the first 7 years of my healing journey:


Going the Distance: The Power of Endurance (With a Foreword by Jacqueline Hansen):


***Coming Soon - The Adventures of Runnergirl 1953***
The Adventures of Runnergirl 1953 takes you on Mary McManus’ healing odyssey from a wheelchair to the finish line of the 2009 Boston Marathon and beyond. After the diagnosis of Post-Polio Syndrome in December 2006, Mary got still and asked for Divine Guidance. She harnessed the power of her mind to heal her body, feverishly writing poetry in which she imagined herself healthy, whole and free from the shackles of her youth. Mary’s quest to heal her life led her to the sport of running that tested her mettle while fueling her journey of transformation from a survivor of childhood paralytic polio and severe trauma at the hands of family members to a woman who embodies faith, grace under fire, courage, determination, endurance and resilience. Running became a way of life for Mary. As you’ll discover in “The Adventures of Runnergirl 1953” nothing, not even a serious knee injury in December of 2014 could stop her on the roads or in her life. Mary’s story is one that will leave you cheering for the underdog and discovering the meaning of different ability as Mary overcame every challenge that life presented to her.

Celebrating Ten Years of Running: On Zest, Joy and Gratitude

I'm winding down the celebration of 10 years of when I first discovered the sport of running, and we are getting ready to say auld lang syne to 2018.

At the beginning of the year, I chose 3 words for the year: Zest, Joy and Gratitude.

I started a gratitude practice after I was diagnosed with Post-Polio Syndrome in December of 2006. I came to the stunning realization that if I had any hope of healing my life from the effects of childhood paralytic polio and trauma that I had to give thanks for my life and all that happened to me finding the treasure, gift and blessing inside of the challenges.

It was an easy habit to continue throughout the year.

It's been a very challenging year as our daughter had 5 hospitalizations for severe PTSD and depression and all that goes with it. As I looked at my runs and paces, it was fascinating to see them wax and wane with the crises that unfortunately accompany someone struggling with their mental health. To be honest, it was hard for me to experience zest and joy much of the time.

On Saturday's run, Tom ran a little bit ahead of me getting ready to take a photo of me. I felt this river of joy bubble up within me. He captured it in this photo:


One of my dear friends, Jennifer, posted on Facebook, "Your zest for life is contagious. Never lose that Mary."

During our daughter's recent lengthy hospitalization Tom and I had time for a time out from the stress of witnessing someone we love decompensate leading up to her making a call to 911 on November 7. We were able to take deep breaths and reclaim our lives. I felt zest and joy return especially on Saturday's run.

Having had a time out from the day to day stress AND making shifts in how we will be once she is discharged are vital to be able to tap into our birthright of joy and allow my zest for life to ALWAYS shine through.

It was a chilly day but we relished running twice around the Reservoir with the sun shining through the now bare trees:


I've learned about surrender and letting go taking my lead from Mother Nature. I am taking the weight of the world off of my shoulders to now focus on celebrating my life and all that I've done during these past twelve years to heal my life.

One month from yesterday I will turn 65 years old.

I'm aware that I have fewer years yet to live than I have already lived and I plan to infuse my days, months and years with zest, joy and gratitude regardless of the circumstances that may be swirling around me.

To your health and wellness
From my heart to yours
Mary

My healing journey using the power of visualization is featured in David R. Hamilton's book, "How Your Mind Can Heal Your Body-Anniversary Edition." It's available on Amazon.


Be sure to visit my website by following this link.

My books are available on Amazon.

Feel the Heal: An Anthology of Poems to Heal Your Life


Coming Home: A Memoir of Healing Hope and Possibility that chronicles the first 7 years of my healing journey:


Going the Distance: The Power of Endurance (With a Foreword by Jacqueline Hansen):


***Coming Soon - The Adventures of Runnergirl 1953***
The Adventures of Runnergirl 1953 takes you on Mary McManus’ healing odyssey from a wheelchair to the finish line of the 2009 Boston Marathon and beyond. After the diagnosis of Post-Polio Syndrome in December 2006, Mary got still and asked for Divine Guidance. She harnessed the power of her mind to heal her body, feverishly writing poetry in which she imagined herself healthy, whole and free from the shackles of her youth. Mary’s quest to heal her life led her to the sport of running that tested her mettle while fueling her journey of transformation from a survivor of childhood paralytic polio and severe trauma at the hands of family members to a woman who embodies faith, grace under fire, courage, determination, endurance and resilience. Running became a way of life for Mary. As you’ll discover in “The Adventures of Runnergirl 1953” nothing, not even a serious knee injury in December of 2014 could stop her on the roads or in her life. Mary’s story is one that will leave you cheering for the underdog and discovering the meaning of different ability as Mary overcame every challenge that life presented to her.

Celebrating Ten Years of Running: It's a Sign!

As I am editing, "The Adventures of Runnergirl 1953," I am in awe of how signs and synchronicity appeared throughout my journey.

When I decided to take a leap of faith from my award winning career as a VA social worker to a poet and writer, I got "random" emails letting me know about the Newburyport Literary Festival. I found myself standing next to New York Times Bestselling authors who were delighted to give me tips on writing and publishing my first book of poetry, "New World Greetings: Inspirational poetry and Musings for a New World." Waiting to get a (non-alcoholic) drink at the bar, the person who interviewed NY Times Bestselling author Peter Guralnick at one of the seminars stood in front of me. I was compelled to share my story with him. "Oh you're channeling from the Divine," he said nonchalantly and offered to buy me a drink.

We found money while we trained for the 2009 Boston Marathon:
But every once in awhile, a little nagging voice asks, “How are we ever going to raise $9,000? How am I ever going to run 26.2 miles?”

And then, God answers in strange and delightful ways.

I had errands to run at Cleveland Circle; a turning point on the Boston Marathon course. After going through the hills in Newton and passing through Boston College, runners turn onto Chestnut Hill Avenue. Once runners get to Cleveland Circle, it is a straight shot to Kenmore Square with just a few small hills along the way. It's only 4 miles to the finish line from Cleveland Circle. Those little inner critics were chatting away. I dismissed them. My passport was no longer valid to travel to the land of negativity. I walked along Beacon Street to Boloco to get take out lunch.

“Excuse me. Do you have any spare change?”

I handed him a dollar bill.

After coming out of Boloco I noticed that the man who asked for the dollar had gone. I looked down 'for some reason' and on the ledge of the Citibank there was change spread out. I picked it up. I knew it was for me.

It was hot from being out in the sunshine. When I got home I counted it. There were 5 quarters, 14 pennies, 3 nickels and 2 dimes. Five quarters is $1.25; 26.2 by adding the 1 and the 5 and scrambling the numbers a bit. We were scheduled to run 14 miles, 15 miles and then eventually 20 miles for our long runs. God was letting me know we have everything we need to go the distance in miles and for our fundraising!

We found a Helen Keller quarter stuck in the mud in a crack between the asphalt on Heartbreak Hill during another training run.

I found a nickel and a penny on our last long run while training for Boston. It was six cents inviting me to trust my 6th sense and that I would be able to meet (and actually exceeded) my fundraising goal and go the distance on 4/20/2009.

Speaking of signs ….

Bernie Siegel, MD, one of the pioneers in mind/body medicine, and a dear friend since the 1980’s, sent me an email telling me to look for the penny. It would be from him and God telling me everything was all right. I found a penny in Wellesley. I told Janine this story as we were walking from the finish line back to the Mandarin Oriental Hotel. At just that moment she looked down and there was another penny. I added it to the 27 cents and the six cents that I carried with me in the back pocket of my capris.

Perhaps one of my favorite stories happened at the 2016 Hyannis Marathon Weekend Race Expo. One of my friends texted me from the Race Expo saying she was so excited that my table was across from hers at the Expo. The 2015 race weekend had been cancelled and I had not thought about having a table at the 2016 Expo since I was going to run the 10K. Not one to miss an opportunity to share my inspirational journey with others, I threw some things together for my table and at the last minute grabbed my Bermuda Half Marathon medal:

“It’s a sign!” a group of runners exclaimed as they walked by my table at the Hyannis Race Expo.

They picked up my medal from the Bermuda Half Marathon.

“We were just talking about how we have to run Bermuda. We are putting it on our bucket list.”

The Mystic Runners from Wakefield, Massachusetts were deeply moved by my inspirational journey. In that moment of synchronicity, we became fast friends.

In January when we returned for our 3rd consecutive Bermuda Half Marathon, this happened:
No alarms were set for Friday morning and it felt wonderful to sleep in and awaken to a Bermudaful day.

We opened the door to our balcony to see palm trees and hear Bermuda bird songs. We went to Windows on the Sound restaurant for breakfast where floor to ceiling windows overlook the ocean. I wanted to stick to my pre-race fueling plan breakfast of oatmeal, banana, juice and toast. We brought our own packets of oatmeal and the breakfast buffet supplied the rest. However, I could not resist the melt in your mouth poppy seed muffins. After all, I was on vacation and you only live once! We read the Royal Gazette while savoring our breakfast. I placed my spoon down on the table and paused from looking at the newspaper. I reminisced with Tom about our dear friend Herb. With a jolt, I was drawn to look outside. I noticed the contrast of the sun and the mist coming off of the ocean. It was as though time stood still. My gaze was drawn to look up. There was a rainbow! I cried tears of joy and gratitude.

“Are you okay?” the woman at the next table asked us.

“It’s a sign from a friend of ours who introduced us to Bermuda,” I said without concern for what this total stranger might think of my declaration.

“Oh I totally believe in signs,” she said.

I love how the Universe surprises reminding us that there is something greater than what the eye can see within us and all around us:



I began my healing odyssey from the effects of paralytic polio and trauma twelve years ago next month. I began running in 2008. What a glorious ride it's been with the Universe supporting me with signs and synchronicity every mile along the way.

To your health and wellness
From my heart to yours
Mary

My healing journey using the power of visualization is featured in David R. Hamilton's book, "How Your Mind Can Heal Your Body-Anniversary Edition." It's available on Amazon.


Be sure to visit my website by following this link.

My books are available on Amazon.

Feel the Heal: An Anthology of Poems to Heal Your Life


Coming Home: A Memoir of Healing Hope and Possibility that chronicles the first 7 years of my healing journey:


Going the Distance: The Power of Endurance (With a Foreword by Jacqueline Hansen):


***Coming Soon - The Adventures of Runnergirl 1953***
The Adventures of Runnergirl 1953 takes you on Mary McManus’ healing odyssey from a wheelchair to the finish line of the 2009 Boston Marathon and beyond. After the diagnosis of Post-Polio Syndrome in December 2006, Mary got still and asked for Divine Guidance. She harnessed the power of her mind to heal her body, feverishly writing poetry in which she imagined herself healthy, whole and free from the shackles of her youth. Mary’s quest to heal her life led her to the sport of running that tested her mettle while fueling her journey of transformation from a survivor of childhood paralytic polio and severe trauma at the hands of family members to a woman who embodies faith, grace under fire, courage, determination, endurance and resilience. Running became a way of life for Mary. As you’ll discover in “The Adventures of Runnergirl 1953” nothing, not even a serious knee injury in December of 2014 could stop her on the roads or in her life. Mary’s story is one that will leave you cheering for the underdog and discovering the meaning of different ability as Mary overcame every challenge that life presented to her.