Friday, September 29, 2017

Run Bermuda! Run Happy! Tomorrow It's Double Digits!



Tomorrow is a big milestone for Team McManus on the road to Bermuda Marathon Weekend....DOUBLE DIGITS ... 10 miles. Now that's only a half mile more than what we did last week but it means that there's only 3 more miles that we have to run in order to finish a half marathon.

We are way ahead of the training schedule from last year. I'm really glad we are building miles slowly and putting down a solid base of miles going all the way to 12.5 this year. We will stay at 10 miles for the next 3 Saturdays.

I have greater dedication to my training this year. Last year I was putting effort and energy into helping someone grow their business and was not as focused and well trained as I could have been to go the distance. I believe that my lack of dedication to my mental and physical training accounted in part for the cramping and muscle spasms I experienced out on the course. It was also a result of conditions on race day and my going out too fast having unreasonable expectations and goals for race day. I was ready to choose another half marathon later in 2018 and take more time off from training but God had other plans; Race Director Anthony Raynor extended an invitational entry to us and well how could we say no?

Last year there was also the stress and worry about our daughter's health and well being as she struggled with severe depression and PTSD.

This time last year, Ruth Anne was in dire straits living on her own, yet she managed to get through October through March working part time until the symptoms became unbearable for her. It's hard to believe that 6 months ago she was first at Norwood Hospital and then at St. Elizabeth's Hospital at her physically and mentally lowest point close to ending her life. I thank God everyday that she made that last minute call to 911 instead of ending her life.

As Ruth Anne tells me, "Mental illness is no joke."

With a new medication regimen and a great team to support her at an intensive outpatient therapy program that is psychoeducational in its focus she is making an incredible comeback on the roads and in her life.

So many people love our post run selfies saying how they love the smiles and the miles. {From this week's 3.11 tempo run on Wednesday and last Saturday's 9.5 miler}


We are so grateful and happy that Team McManus is reunited to go the distance once more having had an incredible 2009 Boston Marathon run. Every run is a celebration of health and healing; for Ruth Anne healing from depression and PTSD, and for me as I continue to gain strength and healing defying the diagnosis of Post-Polio Syndrome, a progressive neuromuscular disease by Western Medicine standards, a result of the effects of paralytic polio that I contracted at age 5 and severe childhood trauma. It takes strength, courage and determination to do what we are doing every week on the roads and in our lives.



My Nike+ is set. We have ponchos on hand just in case that 60% chance of rain turns into 100% chance of rain but we will be going out early hopefully to beat the rain. Water bottles are chilling in the fridge. Bananas and Luna Bars are on hand for our fueling. A ground turkey and mushroom pasta sauce is simmering on the stove to have over pasta with a big salad for tonight's dinner.

Ten miles - double digits - and Team McManus is in the zone to deposit more miles into the Bank of Bermuda tomorrow morning!

Go the distance with strength and courage,
Mary

Be sure to visit my website by following this link.

My books are available on Amazon.

Feel the Heal: An Anthology of Poems to Heal Your Life


Coming Home: A Memoir of Healing Hope and Possibility that chronicles the first 7 years of my healing journey:


And my latest and greatest book - Going the Distance: The Power of Endurance (With a Foreword by Jacqueline Hansen):




Wednesday, September 27, 2017

Run Bermuda! Run Happy! A Runner's High



"Our pace is 17:30," Ruth Anne said as we began Day 5/5 on the road to Bermuda Marathon Weekend at the Reservoir on an unseasonably warm morning in Boston.

"Faster or slower?" Ruth Anne asked as she was going to once again be my pacer for our Wednesday morning tempo run.

"Faster," I replied.

"I've been upping my mental game this week," I told Tom and Ruth Anne. "I've focused on maintaining my physical gains and really focusing on positive self-talk."

(For those of you who may be new to my blog and my journey, a 17:30 pace for me is the equivalent of a 10 minute mile for others without the challenges of having contracted paralytic polio at age 5, experienced severe childhood trauma and having had over 25 surgeries.)

Last Monday we had a magical morning run. After 9.5 miles on Saturday and a week where the heat had really taken a toll on me, I had no idea what my body would be able to do on this morning's run. I let go of any expectations and allowed Tom and Ruth Anne to be my pacers.

We savored the glorious Autumn morning giving thanks for how blessed we are to witness the change of seasons as runners. The leaves are slowly changing losing their bright green color of summer but not yet bursting with the glorious yellow, orange and gold that is the signature of Fall in New England.

I was breathing hard but still able to keep up a conversation. Tom and Ruth Anne would call out the pace from time to time.

"We're doing a 15 minute mile. Oh my goodness we just dipped into a 13 minute mile."

We were soaked and sweat dripped down my face but I kept pushing on.

"Go mom go," Ruth Anne cried out as we ran up the hill. I was wheezing and breathing hard.

"Don't panic. Take deep breaths," Ruth Anne advised.

The traffic light changed and we didn't have time to pause at the top of the hill.

We ran downhill on Eliot Street to finish up our 3.11 mile run.

"Congratulations. You've reached your goal of 3.11 miles," Nike+ told us.

We took our runfie:


Feeling nauseous, hot and hungry makes for an interesting breakfast yet oatmeal, toast, banana and OJ tastes incredible after leaving nothing out on the roads.

I can't remember the last time I felt a runner's high. My body and mind worked as one and I felt ease, grace and joy in the run although I was pushing myself to the edge.

Nike+ showed me a 3 second/mile faster pace than last Monday and an overall time improved by 11 seconds! Our average pace was 17'03"/mile that includes a big hill toward the end of our run.

It was exhilarating to realize that despite increasing miles, I can go out and do a tempo run.

I was reminded of how my personal trainer pushed us during 2009 Boston Marathon training. Speed work and hills were a part of the weekly training regimen. What a blessing to share going the distance again with Ruth Anne!

Day 5/5 - a Runner's High - another week of training in the books on the road to Bermuda.

Two days of rest and recovery that I will thoroughly embrace and enjoy because on Saturday we will hit DOUBLE DIGITS:


Go the distance with strength and courage,
Mary

Be sure to visit my website by following this link.

My books are available on Amazon.

Feel the Heal: An Anthology of Poems to Heal Your Life


Coming Home: A Memoir of Healing Hope and Possibility that chronicles the first 7 years of my healing journey:


And my latest and greatest book - Going the Distance: The Power of Endurance (With a Foreword by Jacqueline Hansen):




Tuesday, September 26, 2017

Run Bermuda! Run Happy! Transformation Tuesday: Taming the Dragon



The Gift of Polio
Thank you God for the gift of polio that brought me so close to you
while paralyzed I saw your face no matter what I’d do
Many wonderful healers you sent them to me at age 5
perseverance and triumph life’s lessons learned
but my Spirit could not yet thrive.

At age 53 the gift was sent to me a second time
having time to sit and feel to heal I started to rhyme.
The second time felt worse than the first
yet your love and wisdom I found
out of pain and weakness and fatigue a remarkable spirit rebound.

Reliving all the trauma of special shoes and such
I discovered remarkable healers who brought a loving touch.
I had no clue I had such strength and the ability to grow
no matter what the outcome deep gratitude I show.

This gift so precious I live a new life gratitude flows from me
my heart and soul are filled with grace each day’s a gift from thee.

from "Feel the Heal: An Anthology of Poems to Heal Your Life"

If you look at my Facebook posts about my weekly training cycles and photos of our weekly runs on the road to Bermuda Marathon Weekend, you would never know the challenges I face every day.

Shortly after being diagnosed with Post-Polio Syndrome, a progressive neuromuscular disease by Western Medicine standards, I discovered the gift of poetry in my soul. In my poems I wrote about gratitude, being happy, healthy and whole, splashing in puddles and running unencumbered and free reclaiming my life from the thieves of childhood who tried to steal my life.

I knew that until I was grateful for everything that happened to me and embraced what happened to me as a gift, I was not going to be able to heal my life.

I used to feel and get physically stuck in my body. I would literally freeze in different moments throughout my day such as attempting to get off the toilet without leaning on the sink, freezing at the top of the stairs needing to grasp the banister and go down one step at a time and could not propriocept doing a squat. Those were a result of the severe childhood trauma I experienced coupled with having contracted the paralytic polio virus at age 5.

I met a chiropractor healer, Dr. Ryan J. Means, in early 2015 and all that began to change. Ironically it took a very serious knee injury and negative encounters with the providers I was working with at the time that brought me to Dr. Ryan's table. He prescribed Theraband Stabilizers, strengthening exercises and showed me how to do a squat at the wall loosening up my once frozen patterns combined with the art and science of chiropractic care.

I remember the day I just stood up from the toilet without needing to hold on to anything. It was a combination of creating a new neural net and strengthening the muscles I needed to use to perform such a simple act, yet for me one that reflected powerful healing happening in my mind, body and soul. And what joy I discovered when I could, gingerly at first, and then effortlessly bound down the front steps to my house without the bannister!

On Sunday, Team McManus went to the Wellesley Boston Sports Club to cross train. I worked out in the pool. I didn't see any steps to walk into the pool. I reminded myself how strong my arms are and easily and with confidence lowered myself into the pool. When it came time to get out of the pool, I went over to the steps ... only these steps were not the metal steps that give the space I need to climb out of the pool; these steps were built into the side of the pool.

As I got to the top step, there was a very narrow margin for me to navigate my way onto the deck. There was a big step from the top step to the deck. As I held onto the bars with no easy solution for getting myself out of the pool, I was about to ask the lifeguard for help. I asked God for help and I harnessed the power of Divine Intelligence within me. I organized myself neurologically, took a deep confident breath along with one giant step up and lo and behold I did it! It was one giant step forward for me in my healing journey.

I do not allow all the things that have happened to my body define me or defy me but I do honor the challenges I experience in taking on the challenges I choose to take on in my life - like training for and running Bermuda Half Marathon III.



One of my s-heroes throughout my healing journey has been Wilma Rudolph, a polio survivor who went on to win Olympic Gold.



When I was training for the 2009 Boston Marathon, my personal trainer told me about her story and insisted I google her. Her quotes inspire me when the going gets tough.



I am blessed by my amazing village. Ruth Anne and Tom support and encourage me every step and every mile of the way on and off of the roads. I have an incredible village on line and in real life who embrace me and my journey. They celebrate my accomplishments and give me the strength and inspiration I need to tame the dragon! Oh what treasures I have discovered within myself and in life.



Go the distance with strength and courage,
Mary

Be sure to visit my website by following this link.

My books are available on Amazon.

Feel the Heal: An Anthology of Poems to Heal Your Life


Coming Home: A Memoir of Healing Hope and Possibility that chronicles the first 7 years of my healing journey:


And my latest and greatest book - Going the Distance: The Power of Endurance (With a Foreword by Jacqueline Hansen):



Monday, September 25, 2017

Run Bermuda! Run Happy! A Good Ache - On Training Together and A Choice I Made 11 Years Ago



The miles are building and so is the soreness. When the alarm went off at 6:30 this morning I reminded myself that we have 10 miles on tap for Saturday's long run on the road to Bermuda Marathon Weekend. Strength training is vital to preventing injuries and keeping the mindset sharp for going the distance.

Team McManus had an energizing 30 minute strength training workout. Training together boosts my energy and confidence. Tom mirrored me as we did the upper body strength training circuit. Ahhh the power of mirror neurons to help my muscles and nerves fire up creating new neuromuscular pathways with each workout.

We find ways to make the workout fun while acknowledging the pain, the sweat and the trembling that accompanies training to go the distance.

This morning on Facebook I just "happened" to see this article about chronic fatigue syndrome. I wanted to throttle my computer as I read how the CDC is reversing its advice about exercise and psychotherapy for those who suffer with chronic fatigue syndrome.

Almost 11 years ago this December I was told that if I use it I would lose it. I was told a cautionary tale about managing the symptoms of Post Polio Syndrome, a progressive neuromuscular disease. Conserve your energy. You have a limited number of nerve cells available to you because contracting the polio virus at the age of 5 wiped out your nerve cells and they continue to die off as you age...It's only going to get worse unless of course, as was implied, you stop living your life and live in fear of the progression of your symptoms.

They told me that I needed to quit my job if there was any hope of stabilizing the symptoms where they were. I was an award winning social worker at the VA just 3 years shy of retirement. I knew I was at a crossroads in my life and had to do something radically different if I were going to have any quality of life.

I asked for Divine Guidance, and after poetry began pouring out of my soul in which I visualized myself as healthy, whole and running free without a leg brace or cane or wheelchair, dancing in the rain, I took a leap of faith leaving my almost 20 year career to heal my life.

After intensive outpatient rehab at Spaulding Rehab Hospital and an angel of a physical therapist who inspired me to heal, I left the VA on 5/25/2007.

I began to feel a little better and as Divine Intervention would have it, I met a personal trainer in October of 2007. I asked her if she thought I could improve in my functioning. I couldn't get off of a low toilet seat or couch. I couldn't pass her initial evaluation to measure conditioning and strength. She said to me that I was too young (at age 54) to be as debilitated as I was. She told me of success stories she was having with clients with Parkinson's Disease, cardiac disease and clients who had never run a marathon before running Boston.

Well I sure as heck had no plans to run the Boston Marathon in the state I was in.....

Our finisher's photo from the 2009 Boston Marathon:


After my first training session with Janine, I could barely move. I had muscles I had no idea existed in my body.

But after that first session I made a choice.

If I was going to experience pain, I may as well hurt on the side of health and wellness.

And so it began....

In December of 2014, I suffered a very serious knee injury. It was a blessing as it lit a fire under me to rededicate myself to my healing journey.

I was incredibly blessed to meet Dr. Ryan J. Means. He is a chiropractor, a healer, a Boot Camp fitness instructor and well versed in the world of quantum healing. He turned me onto the work of Dr. Joe Dispenza. I went back to all that I had learned from Bernie Siegel. Harnessing the power of the mind/body connection I had dissolved a breast tumor through thought alone, so why couldn't I grow a new gastroc muscle, heal my knee injury and continue to heal from the effects of paralytic polio and trauma?

I was going to take a hiatus and not run the Bermuda Half Marathon in 2018.

I see that God had other plans for me using Race Director Anthony Raynor as one of his earth angels as it is vital that I continue to spread my message of healing, hope and possibility to anyone and everyone who needs it.

Training together, Tom, Ruth Anne and I provide emotional and moral support to one another and for me, encourages the physical healing of my body.

I am sore and have that good ache and feeling tired which will ease once I get to my two rest and recovery days before taking on double digits on Saturday.

That choice I made 11 years ago - the vow I made to hurt on the side of health and wellness is as powerful today as it was then. Listen to your body, heart, and soul - not what anyone else tells you about what you should or should not do based on a diagnosis.



Go the distance with strength and courage,
Mary

Be sure to visit my website by following this link.

My books are available on Amazon.

Feel the Heal: An Anthology of Poems to Heal Your Life


Coming Home: A Memoir of Healing Hope and Possibility that chronicles the first 7 years of my healing journey:


And my latest and greatest book - Going the Distance: The Power of Endurance (With a Foreword by Jacqueline Hansen):

Sunday, September 24, 2017

Run Bermuda! Run Happy! Almost Double Digits, Pennies from Heaven and T Shirts With a Message

The day began with cloud cover as Team McManus headed out for their 9.5 mile run on the road to Bermuda Marathon Weekend. We started out with hearty laughter as one of our water bottles sprung a leak. I asked Tom how he discovered it and he told me there was water dripping down his leg. We freeze our water bottles (although soon we will need to fill them up with warm water so they don't freeze.) As we ran by the elementary school on our street (where our kids went to school for grades 3-8), Tom decided that he was going to see if he could make a basket in the trash barrel on our way to the Reservoir. Ruth Anne pointed out that he could break a window if he missed. He took aim with a hook shot and was so proud of himself for hitting the rim of the barrel. He sunk the rebound. What a great way to begin a long training run! Our abs got a good workout.

During our first few miles we talked about goal setting. Ruth Anne and Tom want to run the Hartford Marathon in October of 2018. Ruth Anne wants to run the Boston Marathon again and is passionate about running for the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention in 2019.

After Bermuda Half Marathon III, my goal is to work with a personal trainer to build strength and speed. I may take a hiatus from endurance running while Tom and Ruth Anne go the distance for full marathons and I work on continuing to improve my health and fitness.

As I had the thought that it takes a lot out of me to train for a half marathon, I saw two different runners wearing these t-shirts:



The sun broke through the clouds and the day began to warm up. I realized these t shirts were a sign for me to remember that my mind creates matter. During these past now almost 11 years of my healing odyssey from the effects of paralytic polio and trauma, I have always harnessed the power of my mind to facilitate healing. I've been able to do that which doctors and physical therapists told me I should not/would not and could not do after I was given the diagnosis of Post Polio Syndrome, a progressive neuromuscular disease by Western Medicine Standards.

Ruth Anne found two pennies from heaven during today's run which brings her to a total of $.70 since we began training for the Bermuda Marathon Weekend.

As we did our 3 loops around the first Reservoir and then headed to the "small" Reservoir for two loops and finishing up on Eliot Street, we focused on our most immediate goal which is 13.1 miles in a little over 100 days.

I commented how I hadn't planned on doing a Bermuda Half Marathon III but how could I possibly say no to an invitational entry.

As I go through my blog posts from when I was training for the 2009 Boston Marathon, I am struck by a common theme...my faith and my mission - running for and with God is what got me to the finish line of THE Boston Marathon, having never run a day in my life before April of 2008.

Once again God is sending us signs on our road to Bermuda as we build mileage and maintain a 5 day training regimen.

Pennies from heaven that there are angels watching over us and guiding and guarding our footsteps.

Two different t shirts to remind me that as long as I harness the power of my mind and keep my beliefs aligned with my purpose and my passion I will be able to go the distance at least once more!

9.5 miles in the Bank of Bermuda.


Next Saturday it will be double digits for Team McManus!

It's quite thrilling to be on this healing odyssey.

Go the distance with strength and courage,
Mary

Be sure to visit my website by following this link.

My books are available on Amazon.

Feel the Heal: An Anthology of Poems to Heal Your Life


Coming Home: A Memoir of Healing Hope and Possibility that chronicles the first 7 years of my healing journey:


And my latest and greatest book - Going the Distance: The Power of Endurance (With a Foreword by Jacqueline Hansen):



Friday, September 22, 2017

Run Bermuda! Run Happy! Like a Boss - It's All About Attitude!


As I move forward in healing my life from the effects of paralytic polio and trauma and in the wake of the diagnosis of Post-Polio Syndrome almost 11 years ago in December, I am able to embody a sense of strength, empowerment, being the boss of my own life and allowing the full manifestation of my transformation to come into being. Life has a way sometimes of presenting challenges that end up chipping away at my sense of worth and who I really am. I can easily lose sight of what my mission, passion and purpose is now that I am retired. I've come to realize that some of the choices I made in recent years came from that place of unworthiness and tolerating behaviors in others that should have been stopped dead in their tracks. The important thing is that I was able to move on from those people and situations and arrive at this moment in my life.

As I donned my 2009 Boston Marathon jacket {and here's a Flashback Friday photo of me coming down Comm. Ave and when Team McManus crossed the finish line}:


on this cool rainy morning here in Boston and walked into Peet's Coffee to get a cup of decaf coffee, I walked with attitude. Rather than feeling weighed down by the external circumstances in my life, I reflected on my incredible resilience to have lived through what I lived through as a child and adolescent; not allowing the diagnosis of Post-Polio Syndrome to define me or defy me and the strength and grace I have exhibited in supporting our daughter in her recovery from severe depression and anxiety.



Tomorrow Team McManus takes on 9.5 miles on our training run on the road to Bermuda Half Marathon III.

I run at my own pace and like a boss, run my own race.

In the time it takes many to complete a full marathon, I complete a half marathon. While I'm working on my pace, I'm also working on my attitude.

It's quite the miracle that I am running at all and that I am going the distance of a half marathon for the third year in a row.

It's quite the miracle that I am not in a wheelchair as was predicted back in December of 2006 and that I am as healthy and fit as I am especially at almost 64 years old.

I am blessed by grace and deeply grateful for my strong faith that has carried me through every trial and tribulation since I was 5 years old when I contracted paralytic polio.

Despite all of the little reminders of how this body survived paralytic polio, trauma and over 25 surgeries, I continue to go the distance and build strength and endurance.

I straighten my crown like a boss and remind myself that it's all about attitude and how I perceive myself!


9.5 miles on tap tomorrow for this resilient Superhero and my fellow Superhero teammates. The weather forecast looks favorable and every mile we deposit in the Bank of Bermuda during favorable weather is a gift. We look forward to our time together, unplugged and for the joy in the journey.

Go the distance with strength and courage,
Mary

Be sure to visit my website by following this link.

My books are available on Amazon.

Feel the Heal: An Anthology of Poems to Heal Your Life


Coming Home: A Memoir of Healing Hope and Possibility that chronicles the first 7 years of my healing journey:


And my latest and greatest book - Going the Distance: The Power of Endurance (With a Foreword by Jacqueline Hansen):