Friday, December 26, 2014

Fundraising Friday: Meet Meg Reilly




Ten years ago, Meg Reilly and her family spent the holidays on the "liver floor" at Beth Israel Hospital after her Uncle Bob received a lifesaving liver transplant in 2004. As Meg said, the liver transplant team at Beth Israel is amazing but it was not her family's first choice for a venue for the holidays.

In her own words:

I'm fundraising for the 2015 Boston Marathon as part of Run for Research, the American Liver Foundation team. This will be my fourth consecutive Boston Marathon and my fourth for the Liver Foundation. I've been so fortunate to have a caring and generous group of friends and family who have helped fund research and raise awareness in the fight against liver disease.

My Uncle Bob's new liver was a miracle, but he continues to fight liver disease today.

The amazing work of doctors and researchers have allowed Bob and many people just like him survive and thrive despite his diagnosis: in fact, just recently a cure was developed for Hepatitis C, an infectious disease that can destroy the liver. While we celebrated the finding and availability of the drug, we learned all too soon that a cure for some isn't a cure for all. My uncle completed the treatment and just last week learned that he still tests positive for the disease.

What was amazing to me -- and you, Mary, and your readers, will appreciate this -- is how resilient he is in spite of this ongoing struggle. Instead of letting it get him down, he pointed to the many researchers focused on finding another cure. He focused on the support of his family. He even said I don't have to keep fundraising for future Bostons until we find a cure -- but let's be honest, I probably will! After all, my uncle has always been there for me, whether it's as a voice of reason or to offer a word of support, a friendly face and easy laugh when things are tough, even in major moments, like April 2013, when I stood on Boylston Street just past the finish line, just before 3pm. My uncle has never stopped being one of my biggest cheerleaders, and I'll never stop being his.

Because if I've learned one thing from my uncle, it's that we are so, so lucky already, with everything we have been given and everything we've made it through. And if I've learned two things, the second is that there's no reason to lose hope that there's still another chance ahead.

A donation to the American Liver Foundation helps create that next opportunity. It funds the research and awareness-raising that will help eliminate liver disease. It helps save my uncle's life, once more.

My page is here: http://go.liverfoundation.org/site/TR?px=1019492&fr_id=4420&pg=personal

I would love your support and I will carry your intentions with me not just from Hopkinton to Boston, but on every step I run from now through Boylston Street on April 20th.


Here's Meg wearing her scarf from the Marathon Scarf Project at Old South Church for those running Boston 2014:



and here she is in the orange Liver singlet rocking out Boston 2014:



Meg ran in the JP Morgan Corporate Challenge as part of Team Fidelity. The Corporate Challenge benefits BUILD and the Greater Boston Food Bank. Because of her stunning finish on the mixed team, she was honored at Fenway Park in August:



Meg is also a member of the L Street Running Club and we volunteered together at the L Street Water Stop at the Run to Remember:



Meg runs not only with her legs but with her heart and soul. She will get in the training and can get herself from Hopkinton to Boston but she needs each of you to get her to the starting line knowing she has exceeded her fundraising goal for a cause that is near and dear to her heart and to millions of families hoping they will see a cure for liver disease. Please donate what you can. Every size donation is greatly appreciated. Here is the link again to her fundraising page.


“This doesn’t stop us. And that’s what you’ve taught us, Boston. That’s what you’ve reminded us — to push, to not grow weary, to not get faint, even when it hurts. We finish the race. And we do that because of who we are and we do that because we know that somewhere around the bend, a stranger has a cup of water. Around the bend, somebody’s there to boost our spirits. On that toughest mile, just when we think we’ve hit a wall, someone will be there to cheer us on and pick up.” ~Barack Obama

Monday, December 15, 2014

"All you need is faith, trust and a little pixie dust." - Reflections on Grace



In recent posts I touched on the devastating effects of having contracted paralytic polio at the age of 5 and living in a dysfunctional family. While it was incredibly challenging for me, polio opened the portal to a world where I felt the protection and love from the realm of Spirit.

As I share an excerpt from my memoir "Coming Home:A Memoir of Healing, Hope and Possibility," in "Journey Well":

My connection to something greater than myself began at the age of 5 years old:

As I lay on the couch, my mother glared at me smoking a cigarette. I had to go to the bathroom but I knew better than to ask her. I learned that I had to wait until my father or grandfather came home to be toileted. I had a vision. This beautiful Being with a flowing white beard appeared. A hand was extended to me to climb into a well bucket only there was no hand. I climbed into the well bucket even though I lay paralyzed on the couch. I was reeled up to meet this Being and then I returned to my paralyzed body. I knew that somehow I was going to make it through this mess. I saw this Being everywhere I looked. I saw the Being in my storybook. Whether my eyes were open or closed this Being was with me. Guardian Angel? or hallucination from the fever and pain of polio? I cast my vote for Guardian Angel that was there to protect me. Despite the emotional and physical pain, the abject terror I was experiencing, somewhere within me I felt peace and comfort. I regained movement of my right arm and leg but my left arm and leg remained paralyzed. At least I could wiggle around a little on the couch and could hold my books. Here I was with this cold, angry, rejecting woman smoking a cigarette who would not and could not touch me, waiting for my father or grandfather to come home to meet my basic needs. Despite the precarious predicament I was in, I had a sense of safety. This was my first of many experiences of being touched by grace.


Despite or maybe because of everything that happened to me, I trust in a Force far greater than the human part of my Being and a Force that is pure love and light that is in my Being.

It's a miracle that I always held onto hope and possibility and that I believe in the magic, mystery and mysticism that is available to us.

Last week we were blessed to witness that touch of grace and the magic and mysticism in the Universe as we solved the Boston Marathon Medal Mystery. Its timing is not lost on me.

On January 5, 2015, the trial of Tsarnaev is scheduled to begin. There was a wonderful editorial in last week's Globe about a possible outcome that would spare the survivors, the City and the government time and money. In Tsarnaev trial: Let's not relieve the marathon bombings, Nancy Gertner, Michael B. Keating and Martin F. Murphy, three lawyers, pose the question,

Why can’t the Boston Marathon bombing trial be like that?

It takes both sides — the government and the defense — to agree. The defendant has to agree to plead guilty, and the government has to agree to accept a sentence of life imprisonment without parole, like it did with the Unabomber, the Olympic Park bomber, and many others who committed acts of violence in which people were killed and injured.

This community’s response to the Marathon attacks set an example of courage and unity for the nation and the world. Now we’re reaching the last chapter. That chapter doesn’t have to be one of bitterness, division, and re-traumatization. This is our city, as David Ortiz said in the first Red Sox game after the bombing, and what happens over the next several months will have a deep and abiding impact on all of us. Wouldn’t it be better if the Justice Department and Tsarnaev’s defense attorneys got past the legal technicalities and found common ground? Let’s write a last chapter that guarantees just punishment for Tsarnaev while putting the victims and the community at the center of the legal system’s concerns.


It is my fervent prayer, hope, intention that we are able to experience the writing of the final chapter in a way that would truly honor the memories of those whose lives were lost, and help the survivors to heal.

But no matter what happens, I know that all we need to make it through is faith, trust, a little pixie dust, a whole lot of grace and each other.

Journey well!


"Journey Well" available on Amazon, is a book about resilience, strength, courage and how we are able to journey well no matter what conditions life hands to us. I profile the people who are Boston Stronger and share how 4/15/13 was a wake up call to me to return to my healing path from contracting paralytic polio at age 5 and 9 years of domestic violence as a child and adolescent. I am thrilled that Sollievo Massage and Bodywork is hosting the Book Release Party for "Journey Well" on January 10th from 5:30-7:30pm.





50% of book proceeds are donated to AccesSportAmerica where people of all ages and abilities achieve higher function and fitness through high challenge sports and training.





Sunday, December 14, 2014

Joy in Letting Go - Peace in Surrender!



"Your right leg is leading the journey," Joseph, my mind/body therapist at Sollievo Massage and Bodywork suggested to me after my treatment two weeks ago. "I don't really have words for this but I'm waiting for your left leg to tell its story. It's still encased." He verbalized for me what I experienced in my body but had not yet brought fully into my awareness. I realized it was time to delve into healing the experience of paralytic polio.

I'd been experiencing intermittent knee discomfort for months. Sometimes during Aquatics Therapy my left leg would lock. My right IT band , my right knee and right heel would experience pain to different degrees at different times. Running would help mind, body and Spirit to keep everything flowing. Several weeks ago my left knee was hurting after a run. After taking it easy and two treatments with Joseph that incorporated leg traction it felt much better. After our cat Jamie's dental surgery, I was getting up and down off of the floor and I knocked something out of whack on my left knee. Biking and Aquatics Therapy helped but at times, there was swelling and discomfort.

I wasn't sure if I was going to be able to do the Miss Santa Holiday 5K yesterday. I knew that I had to wait and see how I felt when I woke up. We were signed up as walkers so there was no pressure for a pace. We just wanted to be a part of the day and enjoy ourselves which we did!





I felt wonderful doing a race walker pace. It was cold but I loved being a part of the race put on by RaceCancer. {Be sure to check out their website for more information about this amazing organization!} There was a group of walkers that caught up to us and we were all out there to have a good time. There was a longer part of the loop to go to finish the 5K but we all decided to go over the bridge to the finish line. When Alain greeted us with his warm Alain hug, we told him that we took a shortcut. He smiled and said, "Oh you cheated huh?" I told him we were honest cheaters. It turned out to be a blessing that we didn't go the extra half mile or so.

As we walked to the car to head to the after party I could feel my knee swell. It became more and more of a challenge to walk. Despite what was happening in my knee, we enjoyed a delicious Breakfast Club (minus the bacon) sandwich and the festive atmosphere at the Hill Tavern. We were about to leave when the Silent Auction began.

Tom said we should stay and bid on the Boston Strong basket that no one had bid on.

We won our bid on this fabulous basket of Boston Strong activities to do in Copley Square:



Since I was limping, I told Alain about my knee. He told me to go home and ice it and then posted this to my Facebook wall reminding me that laughter is the best medicine:



Tom helped me get into the house and I began a regimen of ice/heat, elevation, advil and meditation. Tom was my crutch in every sense of the word and helped me get to the bathroom and back.

I was amazed at what my left leg was finally able to release after all these decades.

I was letting go of the pain and struggle I held ever since contracting paralytic polio. I allowed fears to come and go and bathed them with compassion and the mantra, "I trust in my body's ability to heal." Trust. Power. Strength. I felt strength returning to my left leg and knew that powerful healing was happening.

I came to a realization. I need to stop running. I choose to stop running. It's a struggle for me to run and while I have had an amazing run these past 9 months, it's time to enjoy activities and sports that will not take such a toll on my joints. Twenty three years ago I had reconstructive leg surgery to avoid a total knee replacement. My surgeon said he'd give me a ten year guarantee. I plan on making it a lifetime guarantee and one of the ways I can do that is to take the stress off of the joints. There are ways for me to get a runner's high without running. I get it on my recumbent bike now and I get a runner's high during Find your Aquatics Strength class at Spaulding. It's been a gradual letting go which began in my blog post, "That's Enough: Finding the Joy in the Journey." I know that there are wonderful articles about the benefits of running as we age and that running can actually be good for the joints. But for me, for now (and we never know how long now is going to last) with the combination of my knee issues and needing to heal the effects of paralytic polio, I choose to stop running.

Tom and I will always be Team McManus and will share in races together. I told him that he has a chance to shine in his age group now. Unlike the last time I stopped running, I am going to be an integral part of the running community. I am going to volunteer at races and be support crew during Boston Marathon training season.

I wrote this in "Journey Well,"

And if the time comes when in my physical form I am no longer able to run, running will always be a part of who I am. All that I have learned and become through running shall remain forever.


I feel incredible joy in letting go of running and racing. I look forward to long leisurely walks on warmer sunny days in winter and walks on the beach or around the reservoir enjoying being in my body - relatively pain and struggle free. I feel peace in being able to surrender to the experience of paralytic polio and look forward to continued healing in mind/body/Spirit. Today my body feels better than it has in a few months giving it this time to rest and heal. My heart and soul are filled with joy and at peace.

I am blessed!

Surrender

Surrender and heal unpack the bags of the past
surrender, let go, feel free
struggles be gone, there’s too much to do
let energy flow, it’s time to be me.
A woman of strength, courage and fierce
I had to fight my way to get to where I am today
time to take off the gloves, stop working so hard
be soft and gentle, let love light the way.
Nothing to prove, nothing to do
there’s no more time to waste
let fear be gone as ghosts disappear
all the demons have now been faced.
Surrender and heal my new mantra for peace
my body can now heed the call
with help from an earth angel healer
we rewind to that moment when I first took the fall.
Surrender and heal, let joy and possibility flow
everything’s perfect right here and now
let angels surround and be the guides
they’ll lead the way to the how.
To feel whole and balanced in my earthly home
my river of life, my beautiful chi
unceasingly easily flowing
for the first time in my life no more braces I’m free!


Journey well my friends!


"Journey Well" available on Amazon, is a book about resilience, strength, courage and how we are able to journey well no matter what conditions life hands to us. I profile the people who are Boston Stronger and share how 4/15/13 was a wake up call to me to return to my healing path from contracting paralytic polio at age 5 and 9 years of domestic violence as a child and adolescent. I am thrilled that Sollievo Massage and Bodywork is hosting the Book Release Party for "Journey Well" on January 10th from 5:30-7:30pm.





50% of book proceeds are donated to AccesSportAmerica where people of all ages and abilities achieve higher function and fitness through high challenge sports and training.



Saturday, December 13, 2014

It's the Hard That Makes it Great



I tend to not share much about my day to day challenges living with the residuals of paralytic polio. I use my mantra every day in every way I'm getting better and better from Emile Coue and a whole host of affirmations to keep me focused on the healing not on the wound. Even when there are physical challenges such as fatigue or lately having issues with my left leg and knee. I find greater ease, strength and optimism in being able to manage whatever happens or is happening in my physicality. I marvel at how well I am doing and how much healing has happened.

But in last Thursday's treatment at Sollievo Massage and Bodywork, I felt the profound sadness for the experience of paralytic polio. I said to Joseph that I wished there could have been an easier way. I got in touch with the pain of the physical therapy sessions yet I also got in touch with the love and care of my beautiful physical therapist, Miss Holly. I celebrated that I was able to regain mobility and that I have my leg.

My life has not been easy by any means. After paralytic polio and just beginning to walk again, domestic violence erupted as a result of drug and alcohol abuse in the family. It wasn't easy to go to school everyday and become high school valedictorian. It wasn't easy to choose a healing path after the diagnosis of post polio syndrome eight years ago. And it certainly wasn't easy to train for and run the 2009 Boston Marathon.

It's the hard that makes it great.

Out of those incredibly hard life experiences, I am the woman I am today. Were it not for those experiences, I would never have met the incredible people who are now in my life or live with passion, compassion, an open heart and be in touch with Spirit as deeply as I am.


It's the hard that makes it great and life becomes great when we embrace all that we have experienced with Truth, equanimity and gratitude.

Journey well my friends!



"Journey Well" available on Amazon, is a book about resilience, strength, courage and how we are able to journey well no matter what conditions life hands to us. I profile the people who are Boston Stronger and share how 4/15/13 was a wake up call to me to return to my healing path from contracting paralytic polio at age 5 and 9 years of domestic violence as a child and adolescent. I am thrilled that Sollievo Massage and Bodywork is hosting the Book Release Party for "Journey Well" on January 10th from 5:30-7:30pm.





50% of book proceeds are donated to AccesSportAmerica where people of all ages and abilities achieve higher function and fitness through high challenge sports and training.

Monday, December 8, 2014

"Magic is believing in yourself...

If you can do that, you make anything happen."



There are times when I get very nervous with putting myself out there. I've put it all out there in "Coming Home:A Memoir of Healing, Hope and Possibility" and "Journey Well." In order to be vulnerable, honest and share Truth, I have to come from a place of believing in myself.



While writing my story has been healing for me, I am putting my story out there for a higher purpose.

An excerpt from "Journey Well" after a treatment at Sollievo Massage and Bodywork:

"Today I felt that the theme of the session was reclaiming this space as my own.”

“That is your birth right Mary. This is yours to claim.”

“I feel that I am pure love and light Joseph…”

“That is not a truth that is The Truth. And nothing can take that away. Your mission was not to serve these people or be the result of what happened to you. You have a much higher purpose.”


I have been humbled and amazed by people's response to my journey which in one way or another is the journey of everyone. We have all had a past. We have all had challenges. When we share our stories of how we are able to ultimately journey well, we all heal.

I created a page for "Journey Well" on Facebook. Its purpose is to bring awareness to "Journey Well" the book but it is also to create a community of people who want to journey well together. It's a page for posting quotes to help people begin and end their day and to have a pick me up of inspiration in the middle of the day.

I am blessed by the people I have met through my "Journey Well" page and the energy of love, kindness, hope and positivity that is being generated through the people in the community.

I could have retired from the VA after being diagnosed with post polio syndrome and retreated into the background of life. But my Spirit wouldn't let me dwell there. Ever since I wrote the poem "Running the Race," in February of 2008, I began believing in myself and my ability to have a full and vibrant life regardless of conditions. There has been so much magic and miracles and mysticism and so much to be grateful for. It all begins with believing in yourself!


I donate 50% of proceeds of Coming Home: A Memoir of Healing, Hope and Possibility to The One Fund to help survivors of the Boston Marathon bombings.

I donate 50% of proceeds of "Journey Well" to AccesSportAmerica where their team helps people of all ages and abilities toward higher function and fitness through high impact sports and training.







Saturday, December 6, 2014

The Miracle of Healing

Some people believe that going for a massage is a luxury. For me it's a necessity and a critical component of my health and wellness training plan. 90 minutes each week at Sollievo Massage and Bodywork is a time for meditation; to reflect on where I've been and how I've arrived at this moment and what I can do to find greater ease, comfort and peace in my body and in my life. It's an opportunity to heal mind, body and Spirit and as one heals, we all heal. The moments of peace I experience during the treatment ripple out into the Universe.

I become more and more aware of how I live in my physical body; a body I once loathed and lugged around with me. It was what I needed to do in order to survive. Through the treatments of these past 8+ months, fighting for my life and being at odds with my physicality transformed into awareness of how I still struggle in parts of my body. Two weeks ago, I became aware of the need to surrender and to experience perfection in all that is as it was and as it is in this moment now.





Because of the events of domestic violence three years after contracting paralytic polio, my neuromuscular system did not have the opportunity to fully recover from paralytic polio. The miracle is that I now have the opportunity to heal. I experienced the simple pleasures of pouring a pot of tea and last Sunday ate soup with a calm hand. The miracle is that despite all the ugliness I witnessed of the darkest side of humanity; despite all the pain and suffering I endured, I experience the beauty and love that is in the world. Even though I had encountered three rather unethical and unprofessional "bodyworkers", I dared to trust one more time and found my way to Joseph's healing hands and heart, and to Laura and Rose, the loving, caring and tender co-owners of Sollievo.

I'm taking the winter to be very kind to my body and giving myself the opportunity to heal from polio. I'll be cross training on my recumbent bike and taking advantage of Aquatics Therapy at Spaulding to build strength. I'm using the high quality self-care products from Sollievo to take care of my skin this winter and to nourish myself after a run in the cold with a hot epsom salt bath.

The healing cadence of Dr. Seuss got me through those intense physical therapy sessions when I was 5 years old until I was a teenager. When my body shut down 8 years ago after years of neglect, I returned to the healing cadence of Dr. Seuss only now I was the one holding the pen. My pen is my divining rod for healing and interestingly enough, recently, my style of free verse has returned to the cadence of Dr. Seuss in these two poems:

Surrender

Surrender and heal unpack the bags of the past
surrender, let go, feel free
struggles be gone, there’s too much to do
let energy flow, it’s time to be me.
A woman of strength, courage and fierce
I had to fight my way to get to where I am today
time to take off the gloves, stop working so hard
be soft and gentle, let love light the way.
Nothing to prove, nothing to do
there’s no more time to waste
let fear be gone as ghosts disappear
all the demons have now been faced.
Surrender and heal my new mantra for peace
my body can now heed the call
with help from an earth angel healer
we rewind to that moment when I first took the fall.
Surrender and heal, let joy and possibility flow
everything’s perfect right here and now
let angels surround and be the guides
they’ll lead the way to the how.
To feel whole and balanced in my earthly home
my river of life, my beautiful chi
unceasingly easily flowing
for the first time in my life no more braces I’m free!


Transformation

Mary, Mary had to be contrary
they wouldn’t let her garden grow
she held on tight as they tried to snuff out her light
she kept her Spirit safe, sheltered aglow.
A moral dilemma should she fight or leave
she knew darkness could never win
no more destruction let peace prevail
a new day she can now begin.
With deep breaths of healing, a new rhythm of life
one with ocean, the earth and stars
the ugliness pales, perfection can shine
and all that remains a few scars.
Mary, Mary no longer contrary
her blue eyes gentle, wise an ageless soul
all the events once held in her flesh flushed out
only love remains Mary’s now whole.
Mary, Mary so innocent and pure
no longer alone and in fear
a message of healing she brings to the world
journey well she wants all to hear.
May others discover this message of hope
Mary carries her message as a torch for life
courage and kindness, compassion and love
forgiveness the cure for all the world’s strife.
Her heart is so thankful that she made it through
let everyone’s garden grow wild and free
each sentient Being find their way home
to Be the person that they were always meant to Be.


What miracles do you see happening in your life?




"Journey Well" is available in Paperback and Kindle edition on Amazon 50% of book proceeds are donated to AccesSportAmerica


We are having a Book Release Party on January 10th from 5:30-7:30pm at the birthplace of Journey Well, Sollievo Massage and Bodywork, 2285 Massachusetts Avenue, Cambridge, MA. Hope you can join us if you are in the greater Boston area.




Friday, December 5, 2014

On Being a Dark Horse - Against All Odds-Never Underestimate the Heart of a Champion



Before I ran a PR in the 2014 Tufts 10K, I harnessed the image of Seabiscuit. As I was reflecting on my journey after Wednesday's treatment at Sollievo Massage and Bodywork, I realize that I was quite the long shot; a dark horse in the race of life. Contracting paralytic polio at age 5 in a chaotic and dysfunctional family was quite the challenge for me. Running away was not an option. I was dependent on my family for ongoing medical care and physical therapy. I did the best I could with what I had and I honed my intellectual skills. I was high school valedictorian; my investment in my intellect paid off in big dividends as I was awarded scholarships that gave me almost a free ride for my freshman year at Boston University. I had the heart of a champion that kept me moving forward despite losing my father to suicide a month before I went off to college and that gave me the strength and courage to weather going through bankruptcy proceedings on my mother's behalf at the age of 18.

I paid a steep price for focusing solely on my intellect at the expense of investing in my physical well-being.

A wake up call eight years ago with the diagnosis of post polio syndrome forced me to pay attention to and take care of my long neglected and despised body.

Running called to me; running the Boston Marathon came from deep within my soul. It was sheer will and determination that kept me going and the heart of a champion that helped me cross the finish line of the 2009 Boston Marathon. It is the heart of a champion that helped me to run 8 races in 8 months with two PR's after a two year running hiatus.

During my marathon training, I remembered a scene from gym class. In "Journey Well," I write a letter to my 5-year-old-self recalling that moment:

Dear Mary,
Let me begin by saying you made it! You made it through this mess. You are healing in ways that defy what the medical community said would happen to your body after being diagnosed with post polio syndrome. But the physical manifestation is not as important as the healing of your heart and soul although they of course cannot be separated out from one another or separated out from your physical form.

I now know the terror you felt lying paralyzed with no one to care for you. At times your body still quakes in the wake of those moments when your mother smoked a cigarette and glared at you strung out on prescription pain medication. How blessed to have a mind/body therapist who could allow you to process this experience in a safe space and even help us experience moments without any tremors at all! You were blessed by the earth angel Miss Holly, a physical therapist. She introduced you to the healing cadence of Dr. Seuss that planted the seeds for poetry to blossom in your soul to help you heal and bring love, light and inspiration to others through your gift of poetry.

Experiencing "touch that feels good is a move toward health," as Zero Balancing offers. For you to experience touch that feels good with clear boundaries focused solely on helping you to heal was a reminder of those moments of being left alone with no one to care for you. And so you spoke your truth yesterday. I weep for you and what you had to go through but I also celebrate you. I celebrate your strength and your determination to not let those looks kill you. I celebrate your courage to return to school and hone your intellectual skills since athletics did not seem to be an option for you at the time. How amazing that you went to gym class and withstood the taunting of "easy out Alper". How miraculous that one day, when the outfield moved in because they knew you couldn't kick a ball worth a damn, you connected with that ball and it ended up being a home run because there was no one in the outfield to play it. I am so happy that you chose life even though you faced death many times over in the years that followed.

Although growing up was not easy by any means, just look at the life you have had. You spent 25 years in service as a social worker, 19 of those at the Department of Veterans Affairs serving those who served. When it came time to leave because it was a life or death decision, your husband told you it was a no brainer and has supported you through every one of your, at times, crazy ideas including running the 2009 Boston Marathon.


Never underestimate the heart of a champion you may meet and never ever underestimate your own heart as a champion. Believe in your strength and how precious and perfect you are.

No matter what conditions life presents to us, we can always find a way to journey well.

The Thoroughbred

A dark horse
dark past
finishing last
ready to quit
battered and bruised
a foal fouled
yet Spirit unbroken
a thoroughbred deep inside
despite appearances
all she needed was a chance
someone to believe in her
a horse whisperer
in the mist
amidst fog and foliage
she runs
breaking free
transformed
into the champion she was always meant to be.


"Journey Well" is available in Paperback and Kindle edition on Amazon


We are having a Book Release Party on January 10th from 5:30-7:30pm at the birthplace of Journey Well, Sollievo Massage and Bodywork, 2285 Massachusetts Avenue, Cambridge, MA. Hope you can join us if you are in the greater Boston area.





Thursday, December 4, 2014

Choose Your View

There's a beautiful inspirational story that you may have heard of two men in a hospital room. One man has his bed by the window and he describes these beautiful scenes each day of the scene outside of the window. The man in the bed away from the window uses his imagination and feels wonderful during the special hour each day when the man describes the scene. Sadly, one day, the man in the bed by the window dies. The man in the next bed asks the nurse if he can have the bed by the window. When he looks out of the window expecting to see this beautiful scene, all he sees is a brick wall. The nurse tells him that the man who had the bed by the window was blind; that is he was without sight but certainly not without vision. He chose his view and perspective not only for himself but to bring joy to his hospital roommate.



As I presented for yesterday's treatment with Joseph at Sollievo Massage and Bodywork, I told him that I was nervous about our cat Jamie. I told Joseph that I knew there was nothing for me to do but relax during the treatment and to know that the Universe was taking care of her. She was undergoing a dental procedure and it was going much longer than expected. Joseph suggested that I imagine all the beautiful things that were happening to make sure that she had good dental health and would be better after the surgery.

As I was leaving, I thanked Joseph for the wisdom he shared with me before the treatment. He said that even though there may have been more work done than we anticipated, and it might be difficult getting through the recovery period, it would have a wonderful outcome in the long run.

When I got to my car and checked my phone, there was a text from Angell Memorial Hospital with the caption, "Waking up mom. Did great!"



Jamie's vet called an hour later to explain that she needed to have three teeth extracted and while the recovery period might be a little rough, once we got through it, she will be much better off in the long run. She was at risk for infection and had also been in pain. Jamie is a sweet girl which is what the dentist confirmed on Jamie's discharge papers. She would, however, meow after breakfast every morning and would rub the side of her mouth against the furniture. I'm so glad that she's on the road to recovery and can get relief.

We have no control over the outcomes and experiences that come our way in this journey of life. There is one thing we always have control over and that is how we choose our view.



When we remember we have the freedom to choose our attitude, we can journey well.

"Journey Well" is available in Paperback and Kindle edition on Amazon


We are having a Book Release Party on January 10th from 5:30-7:30pm at the birthplace of Journey Well, Sollievo Massage and Bodywork, 2285 Massachusetts Avenue, Cambridge, MA. Hope you can join us if you are in the greater Boston area.

Wednesday, December 3, 2014

Love is a Four Letter Word



Love is a Four Letter Word

Love is a four letter word
I swear by its healing power
as it pulses and courses through the river of my veins
unstoppable
watering everything in its wake
the garden of my soul.

Love is a four letter word
I bear witness
bare my soul
a breath of fresh air when love
enters a room
love ignites
delights
purges the past
forges the present
a force to be reckoned with
reconciles
unveiling
revealing.

Truth is
I am love
only love
pure and innocent
from Love
a rare and precious diamond
Perfection.

Love is a four letter word
the bridge
heaven on earth
all the elements I need to heal
living life as only I can
grateful to be a love.













Tuesday, December 2, 2014

Gingerbread Houses and Gumdrops - On Love, Magical Moments and Healing

"I'm going to be in Quincy at Ginger Betty's on Dec. 1st. I know you're on the South Shore. You want to meet up there and then decide where to go?" I messaged my friend Maureen Lamie.

"How do you know Ginger Betty?" Maureen messaged me back. "We went to the same high school. I used to go in there all the time when I lived in Quincy."

"I'll tell you when we meet up," I told Maureen....

and so an afternoon of love, magical moments and healing happened.

The delicious smell greeted us as soon as we opened the door. We felt a sense of childlike wonder as we were surrounded by gingerbread houses, gumdrop samples, Christmas music playing in the background and a feeling of being home.



My breath often catches when I am in a moment that was brought about by synchronicity. You can read about how I met Ginger Betty in my October post, "Ginger Betty Brings Sweetness and a Message of Peace to Life."

Ginger Betty gave us each a cookie .. her famous Gingerbetty Gingersnap cookies ... true to her motto, "Share cookies...make friends."



Maureen and I did not have a plan for the afternoon. We knew only that we wanted to spend time together. Surrounded by the warmth of Ginger Betty's we knew we didn't need to go anywhere else. We pulled up a stool and the conversation flowed with ease, joy, love and laughter, passion and purpose. Running and healing in the wake of April 15, 2013 was a theme.

Ginger Betty was wearing her MR8 hat. She continues to allow the creative process to flow to find ways to raise money for the Martin Richard Foundation.

The subject of my book signing came up and Ginger Betty said that she would love to do something for the event and plans to come. She took out her order book, wrote down the date and asked me to send her a copy of the book cover so she could get her creative juices flowing. I was surrounded by love and excitement for "Journey Well." I told Maureen that she is in the book and how moved I was to meet her at the Book Release Party for my memoir in May. She said that she remembered when she walked through the door I said to her, "I knew it was you." We hadn't met in person before May.

We discovered connections and coincidences as we lived, laughed and loved in the moment taking in the magic and wonder of what was happening. Soon the shop filled with after school children and mothers, and shoppers getting ready for Christmas. Pure love, joy and delight is the energy that fills Ginger Betty's Bakery. By the way, if you know of anyone looking for part-time seasonal work please send them Betty's way! Maureen and I thought about it and what a happy place it would be to work. We could run off the calories after work on Wollaston Beach.

Life is sweet you know. It's not always easy but the Universe has this way of making everything perfect. Three women who are resilient and strong; who live with open and tender hearts were blessed to share an afternoon of love, magical moments and healing.


My Book Release Party for Journey Well is on January 10, 2015 from 5:30-7:30pm at Sollievo Massage and Bodywork. 50% of my book proceeds are being donated to AccesSportAmerica where their mission is to help people of all ages and abilities experience higher function and fitness for people living with challenges through high challenge sports and training.



Wednesday, November 19, 2014

The Courage to Start ... Again and Again and Again

“The seeds planted in our youth never die. They bide their time until it is time to bloom.” ~Mary McManus



A theme in my soon to be released book, "Journey Well"



is finding the courage to take my place at the starting line over and over and over again; to find the courage to come back after life packed powerful punches.

There was a very special person from my childhood who planted the seeds that now blossom as I toe the starting line at different races and find the courage to dig deep regardless of what conditions there are in my life. From "Journey Well":

I was reflecting on where my courage to start comes from. In reading Bill Rodgers, “The Marathon Man” and Dave McGillivray's,“The Last Pick”, they talk about the people who lit that spark within them helping them to believe in themselves. When I was 9 and 10 years old, I went to Badger Day Camp in Larchmont, New York. My physiatrist, Dr. Eugene Moskowitz, who was helping me to recover from paralytic polio, suggested the camp because of its emphasis on being an all-inclusive camp, having a low camper to counselor ratio and critical to my recovery, a strong emphasis on swimming. I learned how to swim at Badger. I always felt a part of the Camp community. Counselors created an atmosphere of acceptance for all abilities. They encouraged me to do what I could do on the athletic field. They helped me to hone my archery and riflery skills where I could easily earn medals. My time at Badger was a healing balm for the violence my body endured every night. It was also a healing balm for the bullying and teasing I endured in school as a survivor of polio.

Joseph Stetz was on his way to becoming an Olympian. Instead, he gave up becoming an Olympian to pursue his career as a doctor. I can only imagine how many lives he blessed in his career as a cardiothoracic surgeon at St. Elizabeth's Hospital in Brighton, Massachusetts. He was my swimming counselor and in my 2nd and what would sadly be my last year at Badger due to health issues related to polio, he asked me to swim the butterfly in the Badger Olympics. I thought he was crazy. He explained to me that there were only two other campers signed up to compete in the butterfly in my division. He said that it didn't matter what my time was. He wanted me to go out there and swim the best that I could possibly swim. He said that I was guaranteed my place on the medal stand and that I would earn my bronze medal (which as I recall was a plaque) for having the courage to swim in a race that no one else would sign on for. How could I refuse him? He was about 6'2" tall and in amazing physical shape with an incredibly handsome face and warm brown eyes. He told me that he would help me train for the event. He coached me on my form and breathing. He helped me to find the courage to jump off the starting block into the pool and coached me on what form would give me the best start. He "got" me and what I needed in order to succeed mind, body and Spirit.

Badger Olympics Day arrived. He helped to calm my nerves. We both knew that one way or another I was going to finish the race. As I write this I can still remember the tremendous effort it took for me to finish that race. But I did it! I proudly took my place on the medal stand. Joseph gave me his address on the last day of Camp and encouraged me to stay in touch with him. I wrote to him about the medical challenges I was facing and he wrote back beautiful letters of support. He was in medical school at the time. We lost contact through the years until one day in December 2004, I was reading the Boston Globe and saw his obituary. I was stunned for so many reasons not the least of which was I worked as a psychiatric social worker at St. Elizabeth's Hospital where he was on staff as a cardiothoracic surgeon. He died at the age of 62 in a single car accident a few months after he retired.


Joseph was only 21 years old when I met him but he was a soul far wiser than his years. In his Boston Globe obituary, he was described as "an old-school doctor who didn't mind giving patients a much-needed hug," said Bernadette Trenholm, Dr. Stetz's personal administrator and close friend. "Appointments were always as long as they needed to be with him. If the patients needed two hours, Dr. Stetz would give them two hours."

I often feel his presence and will feel his presence when I toe the starting line on Thanksgiving morning at the Boston Volvo Village 5K Road Race to benefit the Greater New England Chapter's National Multiple Sclerosis Society. The course goes in front of St. Elizabeth's Hospital. You can read about my passion for running this race and helping to create a world free from MS and other neuromuscular disorders by going to my donation page. While I am hoping to PR the race next Thursday, more important than my PR goal is my fundraising goal. Please give what you can so that those living with the challenge of MS and other neuromuscular disorders can find the courage to start again and again and again.



The first 7 years of my healing odyssey are chronicled in Coming Home: A Memoir of Healing, Hope and Possibility available on Amazon. I donate 50% of royalty payments to The One Fund Boston to help survivors and their families who were affected by the tragic events of 4/15/13.



My 2nd book, "Journey Well," is coming soon. 50% of book proceeds will be donated to AccesSportAmerica to help them continue their life changing programs





Tuesday, November 18, 2014

Why do I run?

It's a question I ask myself many times in my soon to be released book, "Journey Well." The answers come from deep within my heart and soul. The answers come from other running greats.

"I run for me now. I run for health...I run to discover what's possible for me now and I run to push the edge of the envelope. I run to experience clarity and calm, exhilaration and wonder. I run because it is a part of who I am. I am so blessed to be able to run and to have the opportunity to express my life through my running..."
(p. 166, "Journey Well")

I run to raise money and support races that raise money for causes near and dear to my heart.

On Thanksgiving, I am running the Boston Volvo Village 5K Road Race. I am running with passion and purpose. I sat next to Joel Richards of the Greater New England Chapter of the National Multiple Sclerosis Society at Fashion Plates last Friday. He told me that he has talked with researchers who agree that as they search for the cure for MS they are going to find cures and therapeutics for other neuromuscular conditions such as ALS and other autoimmune disorders such as rheumatoid arthritis.

I am carrying each of the ladies who modeled at Fashion Plates with me in my heart along with all those who live with neuromuscular conditions. I have several friends who are living with MS and they will help fuel my journey from start to finish.

Whether I run a 5K or a marathon; whatever pace I run, whether or not I get that PR of a time better than 46:53, I run because:



Please donate what you can to my fundraising page and come out on Thanksgiving morning to run, to cheer, to celebrate what is perfect in each and every one of us regardless of the conditions that life presents to us.




Sunday, November 16, 2014

Running Happy! Training for the Boston Volvo Village 5K to Benefit the MS Society




Brooks' slogan is "Run Happy."

Running does not come easily to me as one who lives with the late effects of paralytic polio and healing the residuals of violence in my body. While I may not be able to run easily or fast, I can run happy.

It was 30 degrees yesterday but the sun was shining on a beautiful November fall day. I had to watch out for patches of icy leaves on the ground. There was a strong headwind. I was fully equipped with my cold weather gear from Brookline Marathon Sports but when we first set out, my face froze and my fingers were numb. I moved up my neck gator and used the thumb hole from my shirt to help warm me up. As my core temperature rose, it spread warmth to my face, hands and legs. My smile and happy attitude brought a psychological warmth to my Being that translated into physical warmth. I felt capable in my body.

I was running side by side with my life and running partner, Tom. I felt a lightness and ease in my body and a sense of joy in movement. As soon as I saw another runner in the opposite direction, I picked up my pace and waved as we ran by each other. I knew this was my last intense training run before the Boston Volvo Village 5K on Thanksgiving. I was energized from attending Fashion Plates on Friday.

I am hoping for a PR time of anything better than 46:53 which was my time at the Bill Rodgers 5K. It will depend on weather conditions and what my body can give me on the day. I can work to create mind/body conditions that stack the deck in my favor on race day. Running as Team McManus, the dynamic duo, fills my heart with joy and gratitude. Running for a cause lights a fire within me despite my own challenges. The thought of Alain Ferry being at the finish line brings a smile to my face and a kick to my run.

I wanted to allow myself plenty of time to recover from my last intense training run before race day. I'll be doing twice/week Aquatics Therapy this week and will get in the pool Tuesday before the race. I'll have one more massage treatment this Thursday at Sollievo Massage and Bodywork before race day. I'll be pacing household chores and making sure I get plenty of rest in the days leading up to the race. We've run the course several times in snow, in wind and in sun. Next Saturday we will walk the course to shake out my legs and to help me visualize the race I want to run.

I feel a new found strength and freedom as a runner deep in my soul. In last Thursday's treatment at Sollievo with Joseph, I told him that I wanted to work on shifting the energy of confinement. During the treatment many body and emotional sensations came to the surface. Perhaps the most powerful experience was when my left leg got hot from the inside out and the outside in. My left side was more profoundly affected by the polio virus. I sobbed and Joseph supported me as my mind/body processed the memory of having hot woolen blankets on my legs as part of the physical therapy treatments. Emotionally and spiritually, I processed the moral dilemma of how one manages the rage of violation and being battered. The wisdom of Nelson Mandela



joined with my own awareness to help release me from the prison of my past. My work is not in destroying those who tried to destroy me but rather in destroying the hold they had on me. At one point I felt, "So much happened to me it boggles my mind." Spirit responded, "Don't try to figure it out. Be here now. Let the Universe take care of it. Let go of anything that is not love."

Tom and I incorporated many hills and speed work into yesterday's run. I ran from the inside out. At one point, I knew I had more in the tank and left it there for race day. It was exhilarating to feel that I could have pushed but was able to pace myself and hold back. This intimate connection with my body is a blessing.

As we were coming up our final hill there was a runner getting ready to go out on his run. Tom helped me give it all I had and we smiled and waved as we passed him wishing him a good run.

As we came toward the end of our run, Tom had me kick it into high gear. I was running hard. My legs were feeling the effects of running in the cold. I was wheezing; the cold takes a toll on my respiratory system. None of that mattered. I was running happy!

What is even more important to me than a PR is exceeding my fundraising goal to help create a world free of MS. You can read about my passion for running for MS and make a donation to support my run on my personal fund raising page.


The first 7 years of my healing odyssey are chronicled in Coming Home: A Memoir of Healing, Hope and Possibility available on Amazon. I donate 50% of royalty payments to The One Fund Boston to help survivors and their families who were affected by the tragic events of 4/15/13.



My 2nd book, "Journey Well," is coming soon. 50% of book proceeds will be donated to AccesSportAmerica to help them continue their life changing programs:








Tuesday, November 11, 2014

Dear Veterans




Dear Veterans,

Thank you for letting me into your lives, your hearts and your souls. For almost 20 years I was privileged and blessed to serve you. You taught me so much about life, brotherhood, honor, living with vision loss, MS and so many other challenges both physical and emotional. It was often easier for you to show me your physical wounds. I had to gain your confidence as little by little you would trust me with what you considered to be your darkest secrets. Together we bore witness to what kept you up at night, caused you to startle during the day; we brought light, love and compassion to the burdens you carried of guilt and shame. Those burdens weighed more heavily on you than any rucksack you carried and kept you from knowing peace, joy and happiness.

What a privilege to work with the former Prisoners of War. The stories of 20 of the men who attended the Ex-POW support groups at the Boston VA Healthcare system is beautifully captured in Journey Out of Darkness: The Real Story of American Heroes in Hitler's POW Camps--An Oral History.


You can read their stories on line at the National Heritage Museum's website.

The self-proclaimed leader of the group and a fierce advocate for veterans in general and POW's in particular was Frank Molinari:



He would be in the Director's office every other week making sure that veterans were receiving the benefits and medical care that they were entitled to. He knew that I was also a fierce advocate for veterans and arranged for me to receive a Certificate of Award thanking me for my service:



I was always overwhelmed by the gratitude and appreciation you showed me for doing my job, making sure that because you did your job in such a selfless and courageous manor, you received the care and benefits you were entitled to.

Your family members allowed me to help them take care of you; so many of you suffered dementia in your later years. It broke my heart to see you slowly slip away and yet how you lived, all that you had done and shared live on forever in the hearts of those privileged to know you.

Thankfully there are oral history projects for veterans. One of my legally blind, Vietnam veterans is featured in the Natick Oral History Project along with veterans from every era from World War II to today. They include Peacetime Service and those who served on the Home Front. Each veteran holds a special place in our history whether or not they directly bore the brunt of battle. There is also the Veterans History Project through the Library of Congress. Please share your stories so that your service will be remembered and passed down from generation to generation.

I knew that I needed to pass the baton onto younger social workers who could tend to the wounds of the new generation of veterans. I know there are many good people to care for you in the VA and in the community. There are many organizations to help you heal now; many people doing incredible work on behalf of our nation's veterans and their families to ensure that you have a good quality of life and can find your way to your healing path.

When I told the POW's that I was leaving the VA, Frank asked to meet me with me one-on-one. He asked me if he needed to go to the Director to take care of anything that might have led to my decision to leave that was a result of the system. I smiled. I cried and I told him that I needed to go and tend to my physical and emotional wounds from polio and violence. On the last day of the Ex-POW group, they presented me with several gifts from their hearts to send me off into retirement. They gave me a gardening set, some things for cooking and an American Flag signed by all the members of the group.

The greatest gift they, and all of you, have given me and each of us is the gift of freedom.

Dear veterans - thank you from the bottom of my heart. May you be happy. May you be healthy. May you be safe. May you live with ease. And to all of our active duty military on this Veteran's Day, thank you for keeping us safe and free.

With my love and gratitude,
Mary