Tuesday, December 27, 2016

Going the Distance: Bermuda Ready

As I stepped on the floor Thursday morning I experienced muscle memory of being a 5 year old ballerina before the proverbial sh** hit the fan in my life. It was before paralytic polio and before 9 years of violence. I felt my feet inside my Capezio ballet slippers on the polished light wood grain floor in Miss Patricia's Dance Studio.

I felt graceful, strong, flexible and FREE!

On Saturday we had our last long run before toeing the starting line of my second CONSECUTIVE Bermuda Half Marathon on January 15th. It was a test of mind, body and soul being out there in the pouring rain and one that reminded me what I am made of especially at mile 10 when I wanted to quit.

My right IT band and right knee got really tight early on in the run. I softened reminding myself, that I no longer need to hold myself in the defensive stance of a child and adolescent who was brutalized every night for 9 years. What a joy when I was able to release the tightness and know that I am no longer a victim to my body or the memories of those who perpetrated such horrors upon me. As Dr. Joe Dispenza says, I AM the placebo.

I was imprisoned in my body after contracting paralytic polio and then family members imprisoned me with their violence, a result of mental illness and substance abuse. Layer upon layer of abuse built up inside of me until everything began to shut down 10 years ago this month in the guise of post polio syndrome. But now I am free to no longer fear my body is going to break or get injured or betray me again and to know that I can walk away from situations that are hurtful to me mind, body or soul.

The joy and freedom of being a child had been snatched away from me at a very early age. Little by little that joy and freedom returns to me mind, body and soul and out on the roads, going the distance, unleashes that sense of freedom within me.

Two weeks from Thursday we will be Bermuda bound on Delta Airlines. Two weeks from Sunday I walk from the Rosedon Hotel to the starting line of my second CONSECUTIVE Bermuda Half Marathon. I know that I am Bermuda ready!

To your health and wellness,

No comments:

Post a Comment