Friday, September 19, 2014
This Old House and Reflections on Perfection
Tom and I live in an old house. We intended to renovate the kitchen when we moved in but never got around to it. I must admit that there is a lot of charm in the original floor and cabinets of the kitchen. We were thinking about moving; down sizing as they say for the empty nesters. We looked at places with modern kitchens and the latest appliances and shiny hardwood floors with freshly painted walls. The staging of these places looked very inviting. We have decided to stay with the charm of this old house and get a badly needed new front door. We are so fortunate to have reliable plumbers who are on call 24 hours a day and provide warranties for all of the work they do. We just installed a new hot water heater and are getting a new thermostat. We are doing some redecorating but we love this old house where we have lived for the past almost 20 years....it is perfect for us. We are enjoying its light, spaciousness and the comfort it brings to be here.
Shortly after being diagnosed with post polio syndrome, I used meditation and visualization to unleash my body's natural ability to heal. I visualized God as my master electrician helping me to rewire where things went awry from paralytic polio. My pen became my divining rod for healing as I wrote and continue to write poems that set my intention for healing and wholeness. I did a pretty good job and went on to run the 2009 Boston Marathon as a mobility impaired runner. I was blessed to return to my "master magician," Dr. El Abd at the Newton Wellesley Hospital Spine Center for more trigger injections to manage cervical spine disease and to find a physical therapist who helped to get me running again after putting my body through the rigors of training for and running a marathon. I used meditation and visualization to boost the effects of the trigger injections; did all of my exercises as prescribed to build strength and was back on the roads and going strong.
And then there was my nephew's suicide in March of 2011. I veered off of my healing path and went back to old beliefs that this old house needed to be fixed and fixed from the outside in. If only I could shift my posture, get into a yoga pose, be like everyone else in the yoga community, I'd be fine. All the while, my Spirit was patiently waiting in the wings for me to come to my senses.
My return to running after two years in April of 2013 was very challenging to say the least but made so much easier by the love and support in the running community.
And that brings us to today. This old house that will be 61 years old on Christmas Day, is perfect for me. Oh sure I have some short circuits in my wiring. There's wear and tear that naturally comes with getting older. Scar tissue abounds from over 25 surgeries and enduring 9 years of violence but so do courage, strength and resiliency. And while there may be faulty wiring, the light shines brightly within me. I am poised and ready to take my place at the starting line at the Tufts Health Plan 10K for Women three weeks from Monday.
Tomorrow is 6 months since I walked through the doors of Sollievo Massage and Bodywork. I am so fortunate to have found my way to Joseph, a mind/body therapist with a pair of trained, skilled, intuitive healing hands and a heart full of love and compassion to join with my intention to help me heal. We are making my home more comfortable for me using massage and Zero Balancing. There is nothing to change and nothing to fix. We are doing some repair and renovations; we've removed the layers of wallpaper that were filled with blame, shame and guilt. In yesterday's treatment, we found a circuit breaker for fear and a conduit for energy to flow. This old house serves me well. It is just perfect.
The first 7 years of my healing odyssey are chronicled in Coming Home: A Memoir of Healing, Hope and Possibility available on Amazon. I donate 50% of royalty payments to The One Fund Boston to help survivors and their families who were affected by the tragic events of 4/15/13.
I'm working on my 2nd book, "Journey Well," due out later this year: