Run Bermuda! Run Happy! A Two Reservoir Run & Finding My Second Wind

It was a rough week for Team McManus but of course nothing as devastating as it was for Houston!

One of Ruth Anne's friends passed away suddenly. Tom was on a business trip to Las Vegas with a 3 hour time difference and I was heartbroken about the news coming out of Houston and how a dear friend of ours was affected by the devastating storm. I was so grateful for my two days of rest after a training week that required changing up my usual training plan because of equipment that wasn't available at the gym and because of Tom's trip. While in the scheme of things, I had nothing to complain about compared to what was happening in Texas, I was affected by the events happening in our lives. While I am healed in so many ways from the effects of paralytic polio and trauma, stress can increase fatigue and fuel my doubts about my capabilities!

When I woke up yesterday morning, my body craved another rest day. Tom got in at midnight on Friday.

We have the Bermuda Half Marathon to train for and we had 8.5 miles on tap!

I focused my morning meditation on affirmations about running unencumbered with ease and feeling lightness in my body. The weather was perfect running weather - cool and sunny. I focused on all I have to be so grateful for!

As summer draws to a close here in New England we can sleep in and not worry about needing to beat the heat of the day.

We did our core work, had our breakfast, loaded up our hydration and fueling supplies in our Camel Back backpacks that Ruth Anne and Tom are so gracious to carry and we set out for our long run.

Ruth Anne and I had planned out the route during our evening meditation on Friday. Two times around the big Reservoir in Cleveland Circle and three times around the small Reservoir on Route 9. Whatever left over mileage we had, we would finish on our street.

We focused on the joy of the run, the beauty of the day and how blessed we are for each other and the gift of running in our lives.

Ruth Anne and Tom have been looking for new running goals. While a Half Marathon is a challenge for me, and they are so wonderful to run at my pace, they both need a full marathon and be able to run at their pace. Tom still has visions of a BQ (Boston Marathon qualifier for my non running readers) especially now that he is 65 and Ruth Anne wants to fund raise for the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention by participating in an endurance event. We talked about the research we had done together on line and decided that the Hartford Marathon 2018 seemed like a great goal for them.

As they were talking about their goals, I could feel myself drifting in my thoughts. "Well I won't run Bermuda in 2019 then because they will be too busy training for Hartford. Why did I decide to do a threepeat of the Bermuda Half Marathon anyway? My body can't do this anymore. Leave the endurance running up to them."

The tiny seed of feeling tired grew into an entire scenario of self doubts and of course my body followed my lead.



I knew I had to shake it off and remind myself that it's not about my pace - it's about crossing that finish line in January.

While I slogged through a few miles, when we hit mile 8, my energy shifted and I felt happy and inspired to go the distance.

I had found my second wind!

What a sense of accomplishment we had that, after a week of stress and heartache, we set new running goals for Tom and Ruth Anne that include fund raising for a cause near and dear to our hearts and deposited 8.5 miles in the Bank of Bermuda!



A lesson learned for running and life - somewhere deep inside of us, even when we are weary and feel as though life has given us too much to handle; when we feel as though we can't take another step we can always fire up that spark of whatever we need to go on when we hitch ourselves to the Divine and focus on something greater than ourselves!

Go the distance with strength and courage!
~Mary

Be sure to visit my website by following this link.

My books are available on Amazon.

Feel the Heal: An Anthology of Poems to Heal Your Life


Coming Home: A Memoir of Healing Hope and Possibility that chronicles the first 7 years of my healing journey:


And my latest and greatest book - Going the Distance: The Power of Endurance (With a Foreword by Jacqueline Hansen):

Going the Distance: Celebrating 10 Years of Healing: A Daring Adventure

Next Thursday marks 10 years since I took a leap of faith leaving behind an incredible salary and an award winning career as a VA social worker. Fortunately, when the Team at Spaulding Rehab's International Rehab Center for Polio and Post Polio told me that the only hope for stabilizing the symptoms I experienced of Post-Polio Syndrome, a progressive neuromuscular disease, my husband said it was a no brainer for me to quit.

It was rather a rather daring move on my part to withdraw the $60,000 in my retirement account and pay the tax penalty, and not really have a plan for money or a career. There was a force within me that said I needed to "heal my life". At the time I did not realize that what needed healing was the effects of paralytic polio and severe childhood trauma.

I had a vision for the life I wanted to create in the future. During the 6 weeks after giving my notice, I spent a lot of time imagining that life as though it was already happening in my present life. I had a loose plan for my business, New World Greeting Cards, original poetry for every occasion and fancied myself becoming a NY Times Bestselling Author with my poetry books.

My nurse manager thought I'd gone mad when I told her that I was leaving the VA and pleaded with me to reconsider my exit after initially embracing me and the need to heal my life. "You can't do this," I was told by my colleagues and I quietly showed them that yes I could.

I left on a wing and a prayer working to heal myself with the inspirational poetry that flowed out of me.

Despite the warnings from the Post-Polio Team at Spaulding Rehab, I harnessed the faith of my beloved physical therapist at another Spaulding location who refused to treat me like a polio survivor and held the belief that I could get stronger and heal. I dared to hire a personal trainer to see if I could get stronger and when I asked her what she thought about my situation at the time she said:


I dared to set a goal to run the 2009 Boston Marathon shortly after coming out of my leg brace six months after working with my personal trainer. When we first started working together, I couldn't pass the initial evaluation.

I dared at every turn to move forward in my journey ditching so called therapeutic modalities that weren't working for me and getting out of toxic situations and relationships that I was drawn to because of my past.

I was terrified and had no idea what the future held for me - if I even had a future given how I felt at the time and given the diagnosis and prognosis I was given.

Here I am - 10 years later, poised and ready to train for my 3rd CONSECUTIVE Bermuda Half Marathon, financially stable, training 5 days a week,an accomplished poet, author, endurance runner, blogger and motivational speaker.

And to all those naysayers who told me that I couldn't possibly quit my award winning VA social work career just 3 years shy of when I was "eligible" to retire, who said that I was facing a future in a wheelchair and there was no way that I would/should/could ever be a runner; to all those who told me I was taking too big a risk and really needed to reconsider what I was doing I have 3 words....HOLD MY BEER! because after all life is either a daring adventure or nothing at all.


To going the distance with strength and courage!
~Mary

Be sure to visit my website by following this link.

My books are available on Amazon.

Feel the Heal: An Anthology of Poems to Heal Your Life


Coming Home: A Memoir of Healing Hope and Possibility that chronicles the first 7 years of my healing journey:


And my latest and greatest book - Going the Distance: The Power of Endurance (With a Foreword by Jacqueline Hansen):


Mary McManus, MSW knew challenges since she was five years old beginning with contracting polio followed by enduring nine years of violence at the hands of family members. Those early challenges prepared her for taking on the challenge of the diagnosis of post polio syndrome, a progressive neuromuscular disease in December 2006 when she was at the height of her award winning career as a social worker at the Department of Veterans Affairs. Asking for Divine Guidance as she had throughout her trials and tribulations, she discovered the gift of poetry in her soul. Her first poem, “Running the Race,” foreshadowed her 2009 Boston Marathon run. “Going the Distance: The Power of Endurance,” chronicles Mary’s journey as a survivor of paralytic polio and trauma, as a runner and a woman who refused to quit. Eight years after her diagnosis, she was finally led to two healers, a chiropractor and a muscular therapist, who helped her reclaim her life and go the distance, a woman transformed who embodies the power of endurance.

Let's see what this body can do...

After being discharged from Spaulding Rehab Outpatient Care in July of 2007, my body knew that I needed something more than the rehab exerccise program Spaulding gave me. In October I met a personal trainer, Janine Hightower and I wondered if maybe this body could get a little stronger. I couldn't even complete the initial evaluation with her yet she was incredibly compassionate and caring and believed that I was too young, at the age of 53, to not be able to get off of a couch or a low toilet seat and to be as deconditioned as I was. When I asked her if there was something we could do to help me she said let's see what this body can do. When I asked her do you think I really can get stronger she replied with Henry Ford's famous quote, "Whether you think you can or think you can't, you're right." So I decided to believe I could but it was a hard sell to myself. Fortunately, Janine had enough faith for the two of us that lifted me out of my leg brace, ditching a wheelchair and getting to the finish line of the 2009 Boston Marathon.

Last year, after a serious knee injury, I had to find out once again what this body could do. At first I was discouraged and timid about seeing what this body could do. The Universe and my fiery Spirit would not let me stop...



I was blessed to meet Dr. Ryan J. Means, a healer, chiropractor in February of 2015 shortly after a serious knee injury,

Yesterday during my cross training in the pool, I did "sprints" of laps using different strokes. I increased my reps of strength training in the pool. I have increased time holding plank, crunches and sit ups and increased weight for leg lifts and clams. I am going slowly and mindfully but I am pushing myself.

And my body is sore. There are times when I am beyond sore and I do feel pain. Sometimes muscles spasm and I can feel where the effects of trauma and paralytic polio are still stuck in my body.

I am also keenly aware of what is going on in my body and I have total confidence in my body's tremendous capacity to heal.

During my meditation I am able to go back to the source of the pain or spasm and intervene to create a new body. I can harness my imagination to counter the adverse effects of paralytic polio and violence.

I am gaining momentum in my healing journey. I am gaining strength and confidence and so excited to experience the joy of running, of working out, of testing and challenging myself and of seeing just what this 62 year old body once ravaged by paralytic polio, violence and 25 surgeries can do.

To your health and wellness,
Mary

Boston's Local Empress of Enthusiasm

Walter Dunbar, a Boston first responder created Soul Action Alliance, a Facebook community whose description is:
SOUL is the attribute of spirit, ACTION is an act of will, ALLIANCE is a group joining forces for a common goal.
Inspiration->motivation->activation.

As Spirit moves me, I share different blog posts on the page that I feel will resonate and invigorate the community.

After sharing, "Going the Distance: My Recipe for Success," Walter shared the link with this comment:

Mary has become Boston's local empress of enthusiasm. She has transformed her life and runs each step with mind, soul and body. Thanks for showing us what's possible. Anything we choose.

Boston's local empress of enthusiasm! I like it ...

I have rebranded myself with that title. I found these wonderful quotes about enthusiasm that embody the Spirit of my journey:



How do you fan the embers of enthusiasm to create a spark and then set your soul on fire?

My intention is that I've added fuel to your flame. May we all shine brightly with enthusiasm flowing to claim our most Divine and royal selves.




Be sure to visit my Author's Page on Amazon to purchase my books that will uplift,inspire and motivate you to move confidently in the direction of your dreams!

"Enjoy your swim!" "Whether you think you can or think you can't - you're right!"

Before going to the Evelyn Kirrane Aquatics Center for cross training yesterday, I had my mind set on swimming laps.



The last time I swam laps was when I was at Badger Day Camp when I was 9 and 10 years old. It was an Olympic size pool that trained many Olympian swimmers. We swam width laps.



To be honest, I wasn't sure what would happen. I'd been in Aquatics Therapy at Spaulding since August of 2013. While we did cardio circuits in the pool and Aqua Jogging, there was no continuous full body stroke swimming. I knew I could run a marathon so why not swim laps right?

As I checked in, the young lady behind the desk smiled warmly and said, "Enjoy your swim."

After I took the pre-swim shower, I was looking for my swim cap in my bag. I panicked. It wasn't there and I know they have strict rules about anyone with shoulder length hair having to wear a swim cap. Where was it? I thought perhaps I left it on the bench after my swim on Tuesday. I went to lost and found. It remained lost. The open swim ended at 3pm so I knew I didn't have enough time to get dressed and go to CVS to replace it. As my mind momentarily went to oh well I'll take the day off, I felt this feeling swell inside of me that I have to swim today.

As good fortune would have it, my recent mantra of the Universe and I together meet my needs with ease bore truth. They sold swim caps at the pool. Whew that was a close one.

To ensure that I would not back out of my commitment to do laps, the lesson pool was in use by children with physical challenges. I was so moved as I walked by a woman holding a little boy in the water as the sun streamed into the room, "Doesn't this feel wonderful? Feel the sun on your face." I counted my blessings and walked over to the lap pool.

I knew that it was heated but not to the temperature that I was used to at Spaulding or even the lesson pool. But I was determined to get in there and swim laps.

Now here is where the story really gets good and I am feeling a rant coming on which is very unusual for me.

One of the "symptoms" of "post polio syndrome" is cold intolerance. I shivered and shook and couldn't regulate my body temperature. In "Journey Well" I share how even without the temperature changing in the treatment room and it being set at a comfortable temperature at Sollievo Massage and Bodywork, I would experience the room as freezing cold at times and couldn't maintain my body temperature. This dramatically shifted over time.

In last week's treatment, during the Zero Balancing portion of my treatment, I felt my Spirit Helper/Guardian Angel's presence. She has been with me at least since I was 5 and contracted paralytic polio. I had a very Cinderella like moment as she said, "I have a secret to tell you. You are not living with the late effects of paralytic polio."

She is right! I am reminded of Henry Ford's quote:



Several months ago, Joseph said to me, "I don't want to push or pull you to a place you're not ready to go yet but I see you without your story." And then last week commented, "I can feel your body is healed. Your mind and your heart just need to catch up."

I was trying to find the length of the Spaulding Aquatics Therapy pool to compare it to the laps I swam yesterday, and came across this article, "Exploring benefits of aquatics therapy for poliomyelitis patients."

The exact cause of post-polio syndrome is unknown. However, scientists suspect that years of strain on these motor units cause them to be unable to meet the demands of their new terminal axon sprouts, leading to eventual malfunction and permanent weakness. Approximately 440,000 polio survivors in the U.S. are at risk for developing the syndrome.

The article goes on to be filled with cautionary tales about not overdoing it.

I tend to go the other way on the doing it spectrum and most recently am becoming exquisitely tuned into taking myself to the edge and just a bit farther to avoid injury but studies have shown over and over and over again that what you tell your mind, what you believe, will happen in your body. I was blessed to move to the Spaulding Hospital downtown from the Framingham Clinic where my therapist, Allison Lamarre Poole told me she would not treat me like a polio survivor and held the belief for me that I would and could get stronger. I would be very curious to explore what would happen if all polio survivors received the message that they have the capacity to heal from the original polio virus.

Interestingly enough, the physiatrist who treated me after contracting paralytic polio in 1959, Dr. Eugene Moskowitz created quite a stir in the post polio community with his op ed piece in the New York Times as I wrote about in "Coming Home: A Memoir of Healing, Hope and Possibility":

The Westchester Post-Polio Group is grateful to Dr. Eugene Moskowitz (Letters to the Editor, March 3) for providing the public with a concrete demonstration of the negative and patronizing attitude many of us have encountered from physicians. If Dr. Moskowitz finds ''no reason to suspect deterioration in the nerve cells in the spinal cords,'' we suggest that he read ''Proceedings From the First Annual Symposium on the Late Effects of Poliomyelitis,'' in which highly respected members of his own profession advance excellent medical arguments and research reports in support of exactly that theory.

Here is what my beloved Dr. Moskowitz wrote:

Caution and Hope On Polio 'Signs'
Published: March 3, 1985

I read with interest the article entitled ''A Group for Polio Survivors Who Have New Symptoms'' (Feb. 10).

Having supervised the rehabilitation of poliomyelitis patients at Grasslands Hospital during the epidemics of the 50's and 60's, probably including the ''then'' infants mentioned in the article, I would like to add a word of caution and even hope as an afterthought.

Firstly, there is no reason to suspect deterioration in the nerve cells in the spinal cord. After 30 years, one must accept some loss of endurance, increased fatigue and even some discomfort induced by other unrelated medical problems. This is true in the athlete with repeated injuries, in the obese person with back problems and even in the jogger with foot ailments.

Any individual with paralytic disability in an extremity will experience the normal process of ''wear and tear'' except that it may be more difficult to adjust to it. Just as one learned to compensate for the initial impairment so must one adjust to the later, more subtle changes rather than develop an emotional hangup of being a ''polio victim.''

EUGENE MOSKOWITZ, M.D. Mount Vernon

HOPE - that's right HOPE!

And remembering that message, I psyched myself up to do laps. I felt amazing gliding through the water feeling my core and remembering to use my hip flexors, feeling the energy all along my legs rather than overuse my knee joints. I paused and stretched and kept an eye on the lesson pool for when I could return to my "safe" exercises but the Universe would have none of that (and in truth neither would I). Using a combination of breast stroke, freestyle and backstroke, I did laps for 30 minutes and completed approximately 10 laps.

Only then did I return to the lesson pool with its warm waters that felt wonderful. I did squats, used the noodle for quad strengthening and push ups and did a lot of stretching after my 5th consecutive workout.

I felt a swimmer's high and really proud of myself for going out there and doing something I had not done since I was 9 and 10 years old in a pool that reminded me of my Badger Swim Camp Days. I got a great cardio and all around full body workout.

As I was leaving, an older woman was at the front desk who I knew from back in the day when our kids went to school together asked, "Did you enjoy your swim?"

I'm sure she could see from the look on my face that the answer was an unequivocal yes!

Journey well!

My latest book, "Journey Well" is now available on Amazon along with all of my inspirational books. 50% of book proceeds are donated to the Massachusetts Resiliency Center, a safe, welcoming space for survivors of the Boston Marathon bombing to heal and stay in touch with one another; a virtual hub for a widely dispersed community whose lives have been impacted by the tragic events of April 15th and the events that followed.

When terror struck the world's oldest and most beloved marathon on April 15, 2013, it was a defining moment in Mary McManus’ life and the lives of all those in Boston and around the world. It was her wake up call to return to the sport and community that have been medicine and a lifeline for her throughout her marathon of healing the late effects of paralytic polio and experiencing 9 years of domestic violence as a child and adolescent. Mary captures the essence of Boston Strong through her experience of the 2014 Boston Marathon and as she profiles the people who are Boston Stronger. Through her blog posts, poems and journal entries woven together with excerpts from her memoir, “Coming Home: A Memoir of Healing, Hope and Possibility,” you will experience, through one woman’s journey of transformation and healing, that no matter what happens to us, we can all learn to journey well.