I felt unwell for 10 years before becoming sick and tired of feeling sick and tired. In the summer of 2006, I told my primary care provider that I felt there was something seriously wrong with me. On physical exam and based on my "vitals" and EKG there was no evidence that anything was physically wrong with me. He came out from his supply closet of samples from the pharmaceutical industry and handed me Paxil. He gave me a referral to a psychiatrist. I went home and flushed the Paxil down the toilet, ripped up the referral to a psychiatrist and prayed.
"Google Post-Polio Syndrome", Spirit suggested.
On October 19, 2006, with shaking hands and a trembling voice I picked up the phone and called the Spaulding Rehab's International Rehab Center for Polio and Post-Polio Clinic in Framingham; 30 minutes from my house.
An earth angel by the name of Anna Rubin answered the phone.
She spent 45 minutes on the phone with me as I cried and poured out my heart and soul to her.
"It sounds like you do indeed have symptoms consistent with Post-Polio Syndrome. I'll send out a packet of information for you to fill out and Dr. Julie Silver's Book on Post-Polio Syndrome. If you want to see Dr. Silver you'll have to wait until the first of the year but Dr. Rosenberg can see you next week."
I'd waited long enough to take that first step of my journey back to life.
After doing a series of tests in coordination with my NEW primary care provider, the diagnosis of Post-Polio Syndrome was made. I saw Physical Therapy, Occupational Therapy, Speech and Language Therapy, Brace clinic and orthotics clinic. I was told to prepare to spend the rest of my life in wheelchair. If I had any hope of stabilizing the symptoms where they were that I needed to quit my award winning career as a VA social worker. I "had" 3 years to go before I was "eligible" for retirement. I was terrified ... and then got angry that I was in that predicament...and then in February of 2007 I got very still and asked for Divine Guidance. The answer came in the form of a poem, "Running the Race," and then many many poems in which I imagined myself as healthy, and whole, running unencumbered and free!
The rest, as they say, is motion picture history - well not yet - but it is captured in my books.
I sit here in absolute awe of where I was and how I felt 12 years ago to the woman I am today. The years of dissociation mind from body as a result of having contracted paralytic polio and then enduring years of severe childhood trauma finally caught up with me. While on the outside my life looked "perfect" with an award winning career at the VA, a home in Chestnut Hill, Massachusetts and a family with my husband and twins, on the inside my life was falling apart. But out of the depths of my pain and through my struggles to return to a state of health and wellness, I found myself! My healing quest led me to the sport of running. What adventures I have experienced and what friendships I have forged all through that simple little sport of running. My running journey began in February of 2008 when I uttered those fateful words to my personal trainer (who I hired after being discharged from Spaulding Rehab Outpatient care) "I want to go outside and walk. I want to feel free in my body. I want to dance. (I took ballet before contracting paralytic polio)". As Janine was getting ready to leave the house at the end of my session I said, "Wait! I have one more goal...." The words fell out of my mouth before I had time to think. "I want to run the 2009 Boston Marathon for Spaulding Rehab. They have a Race for Rehab Team."
Twelve years since I took that first step on the road back to life. Twelve years and many earth angels to help support my healing. Twelve years and I found an incredible village in the running community. Twelve years and a healing odyssey to inspire others with a message of healing, hope and possibility.
To your health and wellness
From my heart to yours
Mary
My healing journey using the power of visualization is featured in David R. Hamilton's book, "How Your Mind Can Heal Your Body-Anniversary Edition." It's available on Amazon.
Be sure to visit my website by following this link.
My books are available on Amazon.
Feel the Heal: An Anthology of Poems to Heal Your Life
Coming Home: A Memoir of Healing Hope and Possibility that chronicles the first 7 years of my healing journey:
Going the Distance: The Power of Endurance (With a Foreword by Jacqueline Hansen):
***Coming Soon - The Adventures of Runnergirl 1953***
The Adventures of Runnergirl 1953 takes you on Mary McManus’ healing odyssey from a wheelchair to the finish line of the 2009 Boston Marathon and beyond. After the diagnosis of Post-Polio Syndrome in December 2006, Mary got still and asked for Divine Guidance. She harnessed the power of her mind to heal her body, feverishly writing poetry in which she imagined herself healthy, whole and free from the shackles of her youth. Mary’s quest to heal her life led her to the sport of running that tested her mettle while fueling her journey of transformation from a survivor of childhood paralytic polio and severe trauma at the hands of family members to a woman who embodies faith, grace under fire, courage, determination, endurance and resilience. Running became a way of life for Mary. As you’ll discover in “The Adventures of Runnergirl 1953” nothing, not even a serious knee injury in December of 2014 could stop her on the roads or in her life. Mary’s story is one that will leave you cheering for the underdog and discovering the meaning of different ability as Mary overcame every challenge that life presented to her.
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