The past week has been particularly intense for me and sadly for many many women who have been triggered by events in the news. Having contracted paralytic polio at the age of 5 followed by enduring years of sexual, physical and emotional abuse manifested in the diagnosis of Post-Polio Syndrome twelve years ago. Two of the most challenging symptoms were difficulty breathing and swallowing. During my speech and swallow evaluation, we discovered that the left side of my esophagus was sluggish and I was aspirating food into my lungs. I was taught techniques to minimize the risk of aspiration and as my body healed as I healed the breach in my mind/body connection through the power of visualization, the swallowing and breathing issues dramatically improved. I wrote poetry in which I imagined myself healthy, whole and free and running the race even though I sat in a leg brace and was told to prepare to spend the rest of my life in a wheelchair!
When I get stressed, I am vulnerable to breathing and swallowing issues.
The combination of events in the news with the increased family stress challenged all of my coping resources. I added in the image of placing all of the thoughts and situations that were creating physical stress in my body into a hot air balloon. I even downloaded Up, Up and Away and added it to my running playlist. I wrote a lot in my journal peeling away the layers of my reaction to different stressors. Yet I could feel the stress continue to build in my body.
When I presented for yesterday's chiropractic treatment with Dr. Lizzie I shared how my back opened and my breath deepened after our last treatment. My right hip was finally moving freely after putting it through the rigors of 3 Bermuda Half Marathons in as many years.
"But," I went on to say with an involuntary cough.
"You have a cough," Dr. Lizzie said.
We talked about the tightness I felt in my chest and throat. What amazes me about Dr. Lizzie and the way she practices chiropractic care is that whenever I present with an issue, she has something to offer to treat it with a mindful, gentle approach checking in with me to ensure that she is in fact bringing healing and not re-traumatizing me.
I felt wonderful after the treatment but knew I had more work to do to clear the area of congestion.
I got to work in my morning meditation.
I thought about how I could obliterate the perpetrators who abused me for 9 years. I am not a violent person! I went from shooting them to shooting them with an air gun like you do at an amusement park and realized this would not do!
Tom and I have been on a decluttering adventure. It's been several years since we went on a decluttering spree and we knew it was time to do it again. I've been decluttering closets, my thoughts and my laptop. I was over the limit on my iCloud space. I went in and deleted videos and photos.
DELETE! That's it! I can hit the delete button to delete the trauma and the people associated with the trauma. I needed to erase it from my hard drive. So much stress built up inside of me from the past and present and in order to prevent a crash of my hard drive, I needed to dump data!
The next step in the process was to get to work on healing my throat and chest. I could sense that I was experiencing acid reflux that was contributing to the sensations I experienced. I created the image of a beautiful plush elevator with red velvet lining and there was only one direction for the elevator - down! I took deep breaths and allowed healing to happen.
To address the sense of constriction I felt in my throat and heart, I remembered how Dr. Lizzie's hands felt creating space. The image of being on a JetBlue flight with extra leg room and wider seats just popped into my mind. Aaah - feel all that space and reclaim this area as my own.
I thought about those cells in my throat, in my diaphragm muscles and the SCM muscles that Dr. Lizzie worked on while providing me with patient education.
I saw them as happy and free no longer affected by the polio virus or the trauma. I saw them dancing and then the song "Brand New Day" from The Wiz provided the musical accompaniment to my healing visualization.
I felt tightness release and the involuntary coughing spasms ceased! I kept repeating over and over and over again, "Thank You God. Thank You God." I took deep deep breaths and when I felt a hint of the congestion and spasm return I reminded myself of all the images accompanied by "Brand New Day" to fuel the momentum of healing. As the symptoms wax and wane in the face of stress, I will continue to practice these new images and thoughts. I imprinted and gave thanks for every wave of peace, ease and comfort I experienced. I said "Thank you for serenity. Thank you for hearing my prayers. Thank you for the gift of healing."
I am so blessed and grateful for the healing tools I've acquired over the past 12 years. I've dissolved a breast tumor, healed a lesion on my nose, grown new knee cartilage and a new gastroc muscle and prevented the need for a total knee replacement which is what the doctors and PT's said I would need after a serious knee injury in December of 2014. I have certainly stopped the progression of Post-Polio Syndrome and when these spasms and issues arise, I see them as opportunities to heal on deeper and deeper levels. The latest additions to my toolkit for healing, in addition to weekly chiropractic treatments with Dr. Lizzie, are the soundtrack from Heal Documentary, Dr. Joe Dispenza's Blessing of the Energy Centers for afternoon meditations, and reading Dr. David Hamilton's "How Your Mind Can Heal Your Body-Tenth Anniversary Edition." Even though my healing story with Post-Polio Syndrome is included in the book, reading the science and being inspired by others' healing stories is helping me to write the next chapters of my healing journey.
I'm celebrating twelve years of healing, ten years of running and finding creative ways to take my health and wellness journey to deeper and deeper levels of healing. I shed the identity as a victim of my past and feel empowered as I let go and fly free unencumbered by the circumstances around me. As Peter A. Levine said, "Trauma is hell on earth. Trauma resolved is a gift from the gods."
To your health and wellness
From my heart to yours
Mary
My healing journey using the power of visualization is featured in David R. Hamilton's book, "How Your Mind Can Heal Your Body-Anniversary Edition." It's available on Amazon.
Be sure to visit my website by following this link.
My books are available on Amazon.
Feel the Heal: An Anthology of Poems to Heal Your Life
Coming Home: A Memoir of Healing Hope and Possibility that chronicles the first 7 years of my healing journey:
Going the Distance: The Power of Endurance (With a Foreword by Jacqueline Hansen):
***Coming Soon - The Adventures of Runnergirl 1953***
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