Wednesday, March 30, 2016
Reclaim Advantage! Reclaim Life! - Getting Reacquainted -- "It's all so natural.."
"It felt so natural didn't it?" Jeffrey Spratt,MT, commented after my treatment today. As we did our pre-treatment check in he was quick to point out that while there is still some residue from the effects of paralytic polio and trauma that I experienced, I am also tight and sore because I am working so hard both in my role as Communications and PR Director for Spratt Muscular Therapies and co-creating this innovative massage therapy practice and reclaiming my health and fitness. I said to Jeffrey, "Well isn't it fortunate that I work for someone who can help to relieve the aches and pains and stress that come with working again." "Yes so I need to do my job now." We talked about how this is a "good kind of beaten up feeling" rather than the excruciating pain of the effects from trauma and paralytic polio.
When I woke up this morning, rather than going to my usual strength training regimen for Wednesdays, I felt a burning desire to do a cardio work out. What a strange yet exhilarating experience for me to feel the urge to move, to sweat, to get my heart rate up and to switch up my training plan.
I packed up my gym bag and off I went to Wave Health and Fitness.
It's still somewhat surreal to me that I am back at work and when I walk through the lobby of the Seaport Boston Hotel, I exchange greetings with staff. I still pinch myself to realize that I get to work in this amazing environment and yet, when I did my 30 day journal as I was preparing to leave the VA imagining what life would be like after I retired, it included lush surroundings, health and wellness and having wonderful meetings with the purpose of growing a business. Initially the business was my greeting card business with original poetry for every occasion but as Dr. Joe Dispenza is quick to point out, the Universe understands energy and intention not words.
I worked out on the Arc Trainer for 20 minutes and then on the bike for a half hour. It felt amazing to pour sweat and then to be able to luxuriate in the showers in the locker room. After a healthy salad for lunch sitting in the sunshine in the Plaza Level Garden, I went inside for my massage with Jeffrey.
I've been doing a lot of meditation about letting go of the beliefs of the past now made much easier because we have cleaned out so much of the trauma from the fiber of my body and Being. It paid off huge dividends as I was able to experience the goodness, kindness and compassion of the power of Jeffrey's positive touch through the Spratt Method.
I was able to notice when I would tense up and as Dr. Joe Dispenza would say, "break the habit of being my old self."
As memories surfaced at the back of my neck I kept having the repeated thought and finally said out loud to Jeffrey, why didn't I just give up? I said you know how much they hurt me don't you? I cried but nothing like the searing pain of previous sessions. And then as Jeffrey worked on my left leg I had this smile come over my face, my body and my Being. "You know why I didn't give up?...because The Force is too strong within me." I felt a powerful connection to Rey from the recent Star Wars movie, The Force Awakens.
I shared with Jeffrey how sometimes the parentified child gets weary and didn't want to do all of the detail oriented work that goes into growing a business. I had two epiphanies by giving her this space to speak. 1. All I wanted to do as a little girl was to go out and play. I didn't want to have to spend my childhood in physical therapy sessions 5 days a week learning how to walk again. I wanted to be a child and then I certainly did not want to take care of parents who were out of control addicted to alcohol and drugs who turned everything into sex and violence. And then 2. "Don't ever let the past rob you of the joy of the present." I shared with Jeffrey the absolute joy I feel in being able to share the work he does and the amazing practice he has built with an all star team of massage therapists. I get to work, work out, play and receive the most incredible massage therapy I have ever experienced in my life and believe me...I have had a lot of them.
I am reclaiming my advantage and reclaiming my life as I am more active, healthy and fit and busier than I ever have been before in my life; not only with work but in my involvement with the Boston Bulldogs Running Club (to be continued in a future blog post). I am also becoming reacquainted with my body, mind and soul as it was always meant to be. I allowed myself to experience the timelessness and space and Oneness with all that is during today's massage.
And the most remarkable thing happened as Jeffrey did a stretch on my right leg.
"Oh my goodness...do you know that I used to be able to bring my foot to my head when I danced ballet?"
We talked about how, with the traumatic memories moved out, the power of positive touch can trigger positive memories. I can now remember and feel happy memories about being in my body. I can feel safe and warm, allowing myself to be nurtured and cared for through the power of positive touch and you know what? It's the way it was always meant to be. I have moved out of the war zone into the comfort zone. It's all so natural now!
To your health and wellness,