Sunday, August 30, 2015
Going the Distance: Peace & Quiet
Out of our deepest wounds we find our greatest strength, our most beautiful treasures and the knowledge that love is far greater and more powerful than any experience we endure. ~Mary McManus
"Here you go Mary. Here's your receipt," said Roy, the front desk person at WaveHealth in Boston's elegant Seaport Hotel, as he has said every week to me since April before I start my treatment with Jeffrey Spratt, MT, Owner and Principal of Spratt Muscular Therapies LLC. There is always a moment of pause as my trembling hands would sign the receipt. But on Thursday something very different happened.
I signed the receipt with complete ease. Perfect penmanship. My 3rd grade teacher would have been proud of me. Well not exactly because I don't write in traditional cursive handwriting but it was legible and it felt absolutely amazing to experience the neuromuscular connection from my brain, down my arm and to my hand.
I was explaining to Roy that this was the first time I was able to sign the receipt with comfort and ease. He said he didn't even notice! Funny how we get so self conscious about ourselves and nobody even notices! I explained to him that the combination of polio, the staph infection I had in my arm that resulted in open shoulder joint surgery and the violence I experienced as a child compromised the neuromuscular connections for fine motor skills. As he so often does before my treatment, Jeffrey seems to appear out of nowhere right in my peripheral vision blind spot and overhears the conversation I am having with Roy. I'm getting better at sensing his presence though and I turned to see him. He smiled and I repeated my excitement that I was able to sign the receipt with comfort and ease. He gave me his signature hug and led me into the treatment room.
We talked about how important my treatments are now that I am adding miles to my training runs. I shared with him where I was feeling stress and strain in my body. As soon as I lay down on the heated table, I took a deep breath and let everything go.
"How does the face cradle feel?"
And Jeffrey briefly connected with me with a quick scan through the sheet before he washed his hands.
Jeffrey gave me the "runner's flush" on my legs and worked to massage, stretch and flush out the lactic acid and fluid build up from my 5 days of consecutive training. As he stretched my right leg I said, "These legs are going to go 26.2 miles again Jeffrey." As he worked on my leg he said, "And may you run light and swift." It is a blessing to have my legs blessed by him.
As Jeffrey worked on my back he hit a spot that he's hit before that is very tender. As he said when he hit in the past, "I'm sorry," I felt something very different inside of me; a shift. I was aware of the scar tissue that was a result of how I was brutalized on my left side by my father. "Damn," I said. "No it's a good damn." I could feel Jeffrey using his hands, his fingers and his heart to bring relief to the area. I felt an inner strength and I also experienced peace with my past.
"Did you sent an intention for peace with my left leg," I asked Jeffrey after I turned over and he had worked on my left leg pausing for energy healing."
"Not consciously. Why," he asked me.
"I felt this most profound intention to experience peace in my left leg," I replied.
"I can tell you that I was thinking about having this conference on a beautiful tropical Island with the leaders of the consciousness movement and was thinking about Bernie Siegel." He went on to tell me about his vision for this conference. I could feel Bernie's presence.
Bernie had posted on Facebook that his 2nd dog died and I was feeling a powerful energetic connection to him all day. I could feel Bernie's presence and how Bernie would want me to make peace with my past and to send peace to the parts of my body that still need healing.
During the CranioSacral Therapy, I allowed myself to be completely supported by Jeffrey's hands as he moved from my sacrum to my thoracic spine to my cervical spine. I used his touch to allow energy to flow and bring new life to areas that had been hurt.
"You are getting so quiet on the table," Jeffrey said to me after my treatment.
"I know. There were only a few moments of tremors."
"We just have to get that last little bit out of the toothpaste tube and everything is going to flow smoothly."
We had used the image of gunky transmission fluid being flushed out and that's the image I'd been using during my meditation to facilitate the healing process. As Jeffrey used energy healing around my throat, I could feel the toxins clearing out from the trauma of my past.
I had this phenomenal realization that I shared with Jeffrey:
I am the woman I am today because of all that I lived through and just as the scrapes and scratches healed from the tumble I took a couple of weeks ago leaving only a scar - so too is my past finally healed...and while there are scars and we'll continue to bring healing now only beauty remains ... and out of the most horrific experiences comes a beauty unsurpassed because that is the beauty of Divine Love and Light.
"You're feeling the beauty in your scars," Jeffrey said.
"Yes. He brutalized this area with nightly beatings and throwing me up against the wall. It's healing to be able to share snippets about the past with you that facilitate healing. And it's all healing now."
Jeffrey looked at me with compassion in his eyes and gave me a warm hug to seal the healing that happened during the treatment.
It's a miracle and a blessing - the total grace that I have made peace with my past and can experience peace and quiet in mind, body and soul.
I chronicle the first 7 years of my healing odyssey in "Coming Home: A Memoir of Healing, Hope and Possibility" and continue the journey in "Journey Well." These two inspirational books that will motivate you and move you to tears along with my books of inspirational poetry are available on Amazon.